What a Healthy Mom Looks Like

I know I've preached about body image for moms a few times now. I dislike the culture that being a new mom has created, the thought that once you've had a baby it's ok to gain weight and eat unhealthy because you are so busy.

I'm not saying that I don't understand where it comes from. Having a baby is extremely hard work. If you stay at home with them then you barely have enough time to do anything for yourself. If you work full time then you still barely have enough time for yourself. There is nothing easy about it. Therefore, us moms, fall back on this excuse. I can't cook a healthy meal every night, I can't work out, I know I'm heavy but I just had a baby! We have to stop with the excuses. The obesity epidemic in this country is overwhelming, and it's up to us moms to put a stop to the madness. We need to be role models not only for other mothers, but more importantly for our children.

So how do you do it? Where do you start?

Self Image

You start with your self image. People think that the way to fitness is purely physical, when I fact it is mostly mental. Who do you see yourself as? Do you wake up and tell yourself that you are a tired mother with too much to do? Or do you wake up and tell yourself you are strong and that you will knock out your to do list one by one. It sounds silly, but it starts with these little mental games. If you don't see yourself as something better, then it will never come to fruition. Have a power phrase. When you wake up, tell yourself something positive for the day. For example, I wake up on a work day and I tell myself that I am a hard worker, that my job is important, that I want to always make a good impression on our clients. I start my day out with a positive view, then I go into work and I do my best. It's the same thing with fitness. Wake up and tell yourself that you aren't a tired mom, you are a strong woman who can take on anything, especially that cute little baby you made.

Set Goals

If we aren't working toward something then we can't better ourselves. I've always struggled with fitness goals. The key is to not set something unrealistic. Make small, tangible goals. Things that you can meet and see the result yourself. If I set a goal that I want to lose 20 lbs, then I am working and working to do that and it may be a while before I see that result. It is a lot easier to get discouraged that way. So set smaller goals, meet those goals, then set a new goal. Whether its being able to run a mile in so many minutes or lose 5 lbs, smaller goals allow us to plan and see results on our way to our big goals.

Diet

The dreaded word. Diet. When you start messing with people's food they get antsy. They get defensive. They start to say thing like can't, won't, or if you take away my bread I will claw your face off. We get into the habit of saying things like "I can't live without Ice cream." What a silly thing to say. You really can't live without these certain food groups? Of course you can. This is where we go back to the mental part of this puzzle. Change your mindset. My example is the choice to live grain free. When my husband started this I thought he was crazy. I would say that I couldn't live without sandwiches, pasta, rice, and oh my goodness DONUTS! Then I would go put on my cute jeans and try to tuck my love handles into my pants. Do I want to go another summer where I am not quite comfortable in that dress, those shorts, that bikini. We are busy, remember? So how can we have time to worry about what we are wearing? So I changed my mindset. Don't focus on what you can't eat, focus on what you can. Find a blog that has easy, healthy cooking ideas and get motivated. For me it is nom nom paleo. I don't necessarily eat 'paleo', but she is a working mother who rocks out at cooking healthy food for her children. Her recipes are easy and her iPad app is extremely helpful.

Preparation

Time management is the name of the game as a mom. I get off at 6pm and have to nurse Will to sleep at 7:30, giving me about an hour to shower, wash bottles, and eat dinner. Cooking is not really an option for me on week nights. So I prepare on the weekends, I spend a few hours on Sunday cooking all of my lunches and prepping my dinners for the whole work week. This allows me to eat healthy all week with no excuses.

Exercise

I used to run. Now I have realized that for me running is not a great option. It's a huge time suck. While I might go for a short run here and there when its warm I can't count on that being my sole form of exercise anymore. Therefore I had to pick something that was easy to do at home and that I can do quickly. For the time being I have chosen doing workouts with kettle bells and my own body weight. I am lucky because Brent is a fitness guru and makes exercise plans for me to do. If your husband doesn't exercise for a living then once again, find a blog or forum that will give you workouts and keep you accountable. My main goal is to one day start crossfit, however our schedules don't allow it right now. Whatever you enjoy, do it, and do it consistently.

The Gist

Think positive and stick with your plan. I am doing the grain free challenge: grain free for 30 days. It's a tangible goal. I am 3 weeks in and I have lost 4 pounds. I am seeing results and feeling great in the process. Once my 30 days are up I will continue being grain free for the most part, but plan on eating wheat on occasion. That way every few months I can eat a pizza or have a donut, it's all about moderation. Grains will not be a part of my everyday diet. Once you pick your thing, own it. Stick with it. Show your kids that health is a priority, it starts with us.

Breastfeeding: 252 days and counting

Here we go again! My favorite topic, boobs. You would think I was a 13 year old boy.

8 months in, still going strong. I can't believe that all my fat boy is getting is breastmilk. He weighs well over 21 lbs and hasn't consistently eaten solids yet. Everyday I try something new, a bite of green beans, a taste of chicken. Now he will gladly open his mouth to try, but usually only take a few bites before he squeezes his lips together and turns away. It's nice to not worry about whether or not he is getting a balanced meal everyday, my boobs are providing everything he needs. So we take it slow, one tiny bite at a time, until he catches on.

Until then we will keep on nursing. He is down to 5 nursing sessions in a 24 hour period, sometimes 4 or sometimes 6, depending on how the day goes. I still hate pumping at work, but whatever the boy needs I'll do. I know that soon we will be done breastfeeding. Once he gets the hang of solids we will cut back on nursing during the day, but I plan on night nursing as much as he wants. The comfort and bonding time that we both get from it is too important to just stop.

Babies need breastmilk for at least 1 year. I'll keep you guys updated on what that one year milestone looks like, feels like, as it is rapidly approaching. As always, I think I have a grand plan, but I'm sure it will change.

2012: our year in review

The year that you have your first child is a memorable one. One minute you feel like you don't know anything, and the next you feel like you are smarter than you have ever been. It is intense. There isn't much else I remember about 2012. We had four full months of this year sans Will, and I hardly remember them. I do remember I ate a lot of doughnuts. Mmmm doughnuts.

I also remember the waiting.

We waited.

And waited.

Eventually we made the decision to go and retrieve our stubborn little boy. 9 days past my due date and he wasn't budging. No contractions. Nothing.

May 1st, 2012. 11:36am. The first time I heard my sweet boy cry. He was perfect.

After William was born it was a whirlwind of emotion. Your body is full of hormones and chemicals that make you deliriously happy while the sleep deprivation makes you irritable and uncertain. The battle that ensues in your brain makes the first few months a blur. Even now as I think back I have a hard time remembering exactly how I felt. I go back and read some of my earlier blogs about how hard it was and all I can do is smile. I don't remember it being that bad, but apparently it was extremely hard. Everything we do now is so routine and comfortable. Was I really that lost in the beginning?

My most vivid memories were of breastfeeding. I do remember how challenging it was, however, now I can't imagine anything else. The bond that I have with my son is unbelievable. I would go through the hard times again and again to have what I have now. Those moments when it is just me and him, snuggled up together. It's really amazing

When I went back to work it was a struggle to find a balance. Brent and I began our new roles as parents. Life moved on with no thought as to how we might feel about it. Before I knew it I was back to my 40 hour work week and Brent was a stay at home dad trying to balance baby and training. He took over so many household chores for me because I was too exhausted after work to cook or clean. I would get home at 6, spend an hour getting ready for work the next day, then spend an hour nursing Will and putting him down for the night. There just wasn't time. Meanwhile, Brent was cooking, cleaning, and taking care of the boy all day. The change was harder than I thought. Even though I knew that my plate was full with baby, breastfeeding, and work, I felt useless not being more of a help around the house. It was hard to let go and relax. It took months for us to really find our groove. We were each having our own little identity crisis. How did we survive it? We supported each other. We were patient with each other. We talked to each other. William made us want to be better people and it turns out all of that change isn't going to happen over night.

Now here we are, 2013. William is growing and changing everyday. You never know what you are going to wake up to. This week he started clapping. Something so simple, yet every time he does it I can't help but laugh and clap with him. Brent has been reminding me to live in the moment when it comes to William. Don't think about when he can walk, talk, or what he will enjoy as a child. Take things day by day and enjoy every minute.

A quick message to William:

You are 8 months old this month. I absolutely can't believe it. Your favorite things are clapping, standing, and getting into things that you aren't supposed to get into. After a month or so of trying to crawl you finally nailed it this week. Now sitting you down in one spot and leaving the room for a second is not an option, even if you are surrounded by toys you will by pass them all to crawl over and pick up a sock or try to pull over the space heater or chew on an electrical cord. We are really in for it when you start walking.

Another favorite thing of yours is me, your momma. Apparently it is an evolutionary thing. When babies realize they can crawl, walk, become mobile it is their instinct to become more clingy to mom. This way they wouldn't wander off and get eaten by a lion or some other predator. Obviously there is nothing that is going to eat you around here, but I love the fact that you adore me right now. I know soon you will become an independent little man and these moments are fleeting.

I love you buddy. Everyday is new and exciting. Thanks for making 2012 the best year yet.