To all of my soon to be mom friends and all other moms out there...
Not sure if you all have read my blog post about my post Partum body, but I wanted to give a sort of update. I think it's important for us ladies to be reminded that we need to be happy about our bodies after baby.
With that being said, 7 months after baby, I have never felt sexier or more confident about my body. I know that we usually hear the opposite, and there are such negative connotations when it comes to women and their looks after child birth. I'm not sure what happened, but I feel like a grown ass women now. It wasn't my age or my degree or any of my other life accomplishments, it was my son that made me feel like me. I used to freak when I was pregnant that I would never look the same. It's a natural response. However, I can honestly say that there is something magical about being a mother that will make you feel like you can take on anything, love handles and all. Sure, my stomach isn't as tight as it used to be, but I feel beautiful, and you should too. Be healthy, eat right (which means eating the occasional blizzard I think...), and take care of yourself.
Motherhood, parenthood, all of it rocks. If anyone tells you otherwise then they are doing it wrong. I'm not saying it isn't hard, but difficult is different then bad. Remember that and you will be fine.
Hugs and kisses to my hot mommas.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Friday, November 16, 2012
Cloth Diaper Reviews: The good, the rash, and the bulky!
Cloth diapers. Most people hear those two words and cringe. Whether they have kids or not, it's always the same reaction. Cloth diapers? Gross. Good luck. You don't want to do that. I had a friend who used cloth diapers and they all died. DIED!
Because of these reactions I vetoed cloth diapers from the start. I was so concerned with getting breastfeeding right that I couldn't have one more thing to figure out. Thankfully our family stocked us up on disposable diapers, enough to last us a little past the 5 month mark. As our supply dwindled I began to do the math on disposable diaper cost. Damn. It's expensive. Not to mention the giant diaper logs that came out of our diaper genie were now sitting in a landfill somewhere NOT decomposing. Just sitting. Thus, the research began.
The first few blogs that I found were so overwhelming that it would typically end with me closing the laptop and rubbing my temples. So much information and SO many diapers to choose from. I couldn't even comprehend where to begin. Then I found this:
http://www.kitchenstewardship.com/2012/04/24/cloth-diaper-review-whats-the-best-cloth-diaper-for-you/
This woman reviewed 25 styles of diapers and did this amazing comprehensive breakdown on each one, including videos for each on how to put them on, take them off, re-size them, and much more. She even devised a scoring system for each and showed how they worked for her "chunky" baby (sound familiar) and her 3 year old. If it wasn't for this blog I would still be lost in cloth diaper hell.
I read and re-read this blog for weeks, narrowed it down to 6 of my favorites, then watched and re-watched the videos on those 6, and narrowed it down to four. The winners were:
Motherease all in one
Sprout Change
Tuck and Go
Go Green Champ
I ordered a few from each brand and let the cloth diaper games begin.
What I got to start out:
Wet bag- that same blog that I read had reviews on wet bags. Wet bags are actually dry, but are waterproof on the inside so that you can throw soiled diapers into them, then dump the diapers into the wash and throw the wet bag in as well. This saves you from having to wash out a dirty pail. I got the Bumkin wet bag for on the go use because it has a nifty strap that allows you to snap it to the outside strap of your diaper bag and a zipper to keep dirty diapers in. For home use I got the fuzzibuns hanging zippered diaper pail bag. It is much larger than the Bumkin bag and has elastic around the top so that you can line a hamper with it. It also has two loops on the outside so you can just hang it from your changing table or hamper.
Drying rack- these are cheap and very helpful! I keep this next to the changing table and not only hang inserts and covers to dry on it I also store all of my cloth diapers on this. That way they are all hung up and it's easy to see what I have clean, rather than them being cluttered together in a basket or drawer. It will be great to use in the summer when I can hang my inserts and covers outside to dry. I have also found that some of my inserts are still a little damp after a full cycle in the dryer so they will need to be hung up anyway to allow them to dry fully.
REVIEWS:
Before I start, these reviews aren't NEARLY as in depth as the blog I posted earlier. So if you want more info on each of these diapers, including video, please check out her site.
Motherease All In One: $17.95
Brent calls these the "Oops I Crapped My Pants" diaper.
These diapers are great for night time use or if you are just hanging around the house with a naked baby. I don't use them when we go out mostly because they are HUGE and don't fit under clothes well. For the most part they are easy to put on, with multiple snaps for multiple sizes. I will say that it is hard to line up the right snaps for the right size when you are in a dark nursery at 3 in the morning. However, I think it will get easier the more I use it. With no inserts or stuffing it makes it very easy to grab and snap on in the middle of the night.
Night 1: Put on at 7:00pm, Will woke up to nurse at 3:30am and there was no leaking. I put on a new one and when Will had woken up at 8:00am it had leaked pretty badly. I think it was an error on my end though, I had only washed them once and they say that you should wash multiple times to reach maximum absorbency. Also, I don't think I got it tight enough because of the aforementioned confusing snaps.
Night 2: the first diaper went on at 7:30 and lasted until 2 with no leaks, 2nd one went on at 2 and lasted until 6:30 with no leaks. I'm impressed.
I also used this diaper while we were just hanging around the house. Once again, it is too big to fit under clothing well, but it did great with just a t-shirt on. Will seemed comfy and there were no leaks the entire time he had it on (about 3 hours total with a nap).
Final Thoughts: This diaper is my favorite for hanging around the house. With no insert it is easy to throw on and he is comfy while he plays. I wouldn't use this one out and about just because it is so bulky.
Sprout Change: $16.95 for cover, $4.75 for inserts (Note that cover can be used multiple times before washing)
These diapers are cute AND easy. I was leery of them because the insert doesn't snap in or go in a pocket and I was worried about how well they would stay in place. It was the cover in the end that won me over. So far it is the easiest to take on and off and the fabric is wonderful. Waterproof, fits well around the belly and legs, reversible, and I can use the cover 3-4 times before washing it.
Day 1: Once again, this isn't as accurate as it should be because I am impatient and only washed the inserts once before using. The first time I put it on it lasted 2 1/2 hours with no leaks. The second time I changed it after 2 hours with no leaks, and the third time it leaked after only an hour. Interested to see how long they last with multiple washes.
Day two: I love this diaper! It is so simple and Will can go hours with no leaks. I typically change him every 2-3 hours because I worry about diaper rash. With these inserts I have been hand washing them with dreft detergent because pee doesn't bother me at all. I get peed on all the time at work so this is no biggie for me to grab and wash quickly, then throw in the dryer. I'm not sure what hand washing does for long term cleanliness, so we will see if they start to smell funny. I don't think it will be a problem since they are still being washed in the washer every other day no matter what.
Final Thoughts: I think I am certain enough to say that this one is my favorite. When used with the inserts that came with it I can go 2-3 hours without changing him with no leaks. I also LOVE that is is so thin and fits easily in clothing.
Tuck and Go: $15.00 a cover and $25.00 for 3 inserts
These diapers are pretty cool. Brent likes them a lot, but so far they aren't my favorite. They have a special insert that "tucks" into the diaper to help hold it in place. They are easy to put together, and easy to put on since they have Velcro instead of snaps.
I like the inserts, I like the colors they come in, but I am not a fan of the Velcro. If it isn't on just right then the Velcro rubs his tummy and causes a red spot. Brent tends to have less trouble then I do with them. I also feel like the insert isn't the most absorbent and I have had many leaks with it. Brent says he has not had too many leaks, and I think this is the only diaper that we do not agree on.
Final Thought: I was ready to write this one off the first time he had a rash on his tummy. However, I am willing to give them another try since Brent is so fond of them. The blog lady was also pretty fond of them, so I will keep using them and see if they end up working for me.
Go Green Champ 3.0: $15.95
Cute, cute, cute! My big draw to this diaper was the way it looked. It is a pocket diaper, meaning you stuff the insert into a pocket. I like this brand because the insert snaps in to place, and instead of having to pull the insert out before washing you can just throw the whole diaper in the wash and it self agitates itself out. Super cool.
I have had this diaper leak quite a bit, but I still really like the way it fits. It is easy to put on and take off. Based on the review from the super blogger all of these diapers did better the more they were washed and dried. I'm wondering if these will leak less the more we use them. This diaper also has a TON of snaps for sizing on them, so it may be a matter of us not putting it on him quite right.
Final Thoughts: I really want this diaper to work because I feel like it fits so well and I do like the inserts. I have also had a few poo-splosions in these that have not leaked, which is always a plus.
To make a long story short....
So which one so we like the best? I think my favorite so far is the Sprout Change. It really does not get easier to put on, I love that there aren't a million snaps on the outside and that adjusting the size is easy. I also love that it is slim fitting which makes putting clothes over it a sinch. And I swear this thing RARELY leaks. The only time I have had it leak was the first day I used it and when I used a tuck and go insert with the cover instead of the one that came with it. I also love that I can reuse the waterproof cover without washing it. If it gets pee on it I rinse it off in the sink and throw it in the dryer or hang dry and I can reuse it. So simple. Brent's front runner is the tuck and go. He had a bad leak with the sprout change a few days ago so he wants to give them a few days before we declare a winner.
Overall our experience has been great. I think it's easy to keep up with the laundry and I HATE doing laundry. If we can do it, anyone can! I typically do a load once a day or once every other day. I admit that I use disposable night time diapers at night. The Motherease did really well, but I hate the thought of having to get up more times than I have to for a leaky diaper. I'm a chicken. A sleepy, sleepy chicken.
I really wish that we had used cloth diapers all along. We still have disposables on stand by for babysitters and just in case we blow through our stash. Once we pick a favorite we plan on buying a few more, but even with only 13 we can last 2 days easy.
Hope this was somewhat helpful! Check out the blog I posted earlier if you need more info on the diapers I talked about here. Good luck!
Because of these reactions I vetoed cloth diapers from the start. I was so concerned with getting breastfeeding right that I couldn't have one more thing to figure out. Thankfully our family stocked us up on disposable diapers, enough to last us a little past the 5 month mark. As our supply dwindled I began to do the math on disposable diaper cost. Damn. It's expensive. Not to mention the giant diaper logs that came out of our diaper genie were now sitting in a landfill somewhere NOT decomposing. Just sitting. Thus, the research began.
The first few blogs that I found were so overwhelming that it would typically end with me closing the laptop and rubbing my temples. So much information and SO many diapers to choose from. I couldn't even comprehend where to begin. Then I found this:
http://www.kitchenstewardship.com/2012/04/24/cloth-diaper-review-whats-the-best-cloth-diaper-for-you/
This woman reviewed 25 styles of diapers and did this amazing comprehensive breakdown on each one, including videos for each on how to put them on, take them off, re-size them, and much more. She even devised a scoring system for each and showed how they worked for her "chunky" baby (sound familiar) and her 3 year old. If it wasn't for this blog I would still be lost in cloth diaper hell.
I read and re-read this blog for weeks, narrowed it down to 6 of my favorites, then watched and re-watched the videos on those 6, and narrowed it down to four. The winners were:
Motherease all in one
Sprout Change
Tuck and Go
Go Green Champ
I ordered a few from each brand and let the cloth diaper games begin.
What I got to start out:
Wet bag- that same blog that I read had reviews on wet bags. Wet bags are actually dry, but are waterproof on the inside so that you can throw soiled diapers into them, then dump the diapers into the wash and throw the wet bag in as well. This saves you from having to wash out a dirty pail. I got the Bumkin wet bag for on the go use because it has a nifty strap that allows you to snap it to the outside strap of your diaper bag and a zipper to keep dirty diapers in. For home use I got the fuzzibuns hanging zippered diaper pail bag. It is much larger than the Bumkin bag and has elastic around the top so that you can line a hamper with it. It also has two loops on the outside so you can just hang it from your changing table or hamper.
Drying rack- these are cheap and very helpful! I keep this next to the changing table and not only hang inserts and covers to dry on it I also store all of my cloth diapers on this. That way they are all hung up and it's easy to see what I have clean, rather than them being cluttered together in a basket or drawer. It will be great to use in the summer when I can hang my inserts and covers outside to dry. I have also found that some of my inserts are still a little damp after a full cycle in the dryer so they will need to be hung up anyway to allow them to dry fully.
REVIEWS:
Before I start, these reviews aren't NEARLY as in depth as the blog I posted earlier. So if you want more info on each of these diapers, including video, please check out her site.
Motherease All In One: $17.95
Brent calls these the "Oops I Crapped My Pants" diaper.
These diapers are great for night time use or if you are just hanging around the house with a naked baby. I don't use them when we go out mostly because they are HUGE and don't fit under clothes well. For the most part they are easy to put on, with multiple snaps for multiple sizes. I will say that it is hard to line up the right snaps for the right size when you are in a dark nursery at 3 in the morning. However, I think it will get easier the more I use it. With no inserts or stuffing it makes it very easy to grab and snap on in the middle of the night.
Night 1: Put on at 7:00pm, Will woke up to nurse at 3:30am and there was no leaking. I put on a new one and when Will had woken up at 8:00am it had leaked pretty badly. I think it was an error on my end though, I had only washed them once and they say that you should wash multiple times to reach maximum absorbency. Also, I don't think I got it tight enough because of the aforementioned confusing snaps.
Night 2: the first diaper went on at 7:30 and lasted until 2 with no leaks, 2nd one went on at 2 and lasted until 6:30 with no leaks. I'm impressed.
I also used this diaper while we were just hanging around the house. Once again, it is too big to fit under clothing well, but it did great with just a t-shirt on. Will seemed comfy and there were no leaks the entire time he had it on (about 3 hours total with a nap).
Final Thoughts: This diaper is my favorite for hanging around the house. With no insert it is easy to throw on and he is comfy while he plays. I wouldn't use this one out and about just because it is so bulky.
Sprout Change: $16.95 for cover, $4.75 for inserts (Note that cover can be used multiple times before washing)
These diapers are cute AND easy. I was leery of them because the insert doesn't snap in or go in a pocket and I was worried about how well they would stay in place. It was the cover in the end that won me over. So far it is the easiest to take on and off and the fabric is wonderful. Waterproof, fits well around the belly and legs, reversible, and I can use the cover 3-4 times before washing it.
Day 1: Once again, this isn't as accurate as it should be because I am impatient and only washed the inserts once before using. The first time I put it on it lasted 2 1/2 hours with no leaks. The second time I changed it after 2 hours with no leaks, and the third time it leaked after only an hour. Interested to see how long they last with multiple washes.
Day two: I love this diaper! It is so simple and Will can go hours with no leaks. I typically change him every 2-3 hours because I worry about diaper rash. With these inserts I have been hand washing them with dreft detergent because pee doesn't bother me at all. I get peed on all the time at work so this is no biggie for me to grab and wash quickly, then throw in the dryer. I'm not sure what hand washing does for long term cleanliness, so we will see if they start to smell funny. I don't think it will be a problem since they are still being washed in the washer every other day no matter what.
Final Thoughts: I think I am certain enough to say that this one is my favorite. When used with the inserts that came with it I can go 2-3 hours without changing him with no leaks. I also LOVE that is is so thin and fits easily in clothing.
Tuck and Go: $15.00 a cover and $25.00 for 3 inserts
These diapers are pretty cool. Brent likes them a lot, but so far they aren't my favorite. They have a special insert that "tucks" into the diaper to help hold it in place. They are easy to put together, and easy to put on since they have Velcro instead of snaps.
I like the inserts, I like the colors they come in, but I am not a fan of the Velcro. If it isn't on just right then the Velcro rubs his tummy and causes a red spot. Brent tends to have less trouble then I do with them. I also feel like the insert isn't the most absorbent and I have had many leaks with it. Brent says he has not had too many leaks, and I think this is the only diaper that we do not agree on.
Final Thought: I was ready to write this one off the first time he had a rash on his tummy. However, I am willing to give them another try since Brent is so fond of them. The blog lady was also pretty fond of them, so I will keep using them and see if they end up working for me.
Go Green Champ 3.0: $15.95
Cute, cute, cute! My big draw to this diaper was the way it looked. It is a pocket diaper, meaning you stuff the insert into a pocket. I like this brand because the insert snaps in to place, and instead of having to pull the insert out before washing you can just throw the whole diaper in the wash and it self agitates itself out. Super cool.
I have had this diaper leak quite a bit, but I still really like the way it fits. It is easy to put on and take off. Based on the review from the super blogger all of these diapers did better the more they were washed and dried. I'm wondering if these will leak less the more we use them. This diaper also has a TON of snaps for sizing on them, so it may be a matter of us not putting it on him quite right.
Final Thoughts: I really want this diaper to work because I feel like it fits so well and I do like the inserts. I have also had a few poo-splosions in these that have not leaked, which is always a plus.
To make a long story short....
So which one so we like the best? I think my favorite so far is the Sprout Change. It really does not get easier to put on, I love that there aren't a million snaps on the outside and that adjusting the size is easy. I also love that it is slim fitting which makes putting clothes over it a sinch. And I swear this thing RARELY leaks. The only time I have had it leak was the first day I used it and when I used a tuck and go insert with the cover instead of the one that came with it. I also love that I can reuse the waterproof cover without washing it. If it gets pee on it I rinse it off in the sink and throw it in the dryer or hang dry and I can reuse it. So simple. Brent's front runner is the tuck and go. He had a bad leak with the sprout change a few days ago so he wants to give them a few days before we declare a winner.
Overall our experience has been great. I think it's easy to keep up with the laundry and I HATE doing laundry. If we can do it, anyone can! I typically do a load once a day or once every other day. I admit that I use disposable night time diapers at night. The Motherease did really well, but I hate the thought of having to get up more times than I have to for a leaky diaper. I'm a chicken. A sleepy, sleepy chicken.
I really wish that we had used cloth diapers all along. We still have disposables on stand by for babysitters and just in case we blow through our stash. Once we pick a favorite we plan on buying a few more, but even with only 13 we can last 2 days easy.
Hope this was somewhat helpful! Check out the blog I posted earlier if you need more info on the diapers I talked about here. Good luck!
Friday, November 2, 2012
A note to my son: 6 Months
Dear William,
It's crazy to think that you are 6 months old. This time last year you couldn't even tell I was pregnant, and now I can't imagine life without you.
You now have a personality and I'm glad to say that you are a fun baby. You are always smiling and laughing and you are so inquisitive. If there is something you can grab then you grab it and ultimately it ends up in your mouth. Many a time I've had to dig paper out of your mouth because you've snagged an envelope or magazine without me noticing. It makes everything a little more interesting and everyday I realize the second you can walk we are in big trouble.
Which brings me to my next topic. Laying on your back and just hanging out was so two months ago. You aren't happy unless you are rolling around or sitting up. I'm sure you will be crawling soon, your dad swears that you crawled a little the other day but I've yet to see it so I think he's crazy. We have to be really careful if you are on the couch or bed because you will roll right off. Good thing babies are bouncy....
You've also started to snuggle with us when we hold you. You bury your head in our necks and grab us with both hands. The overwhelming happiness that I get when you do this is indescribable. You especially love it if your dad and I hug and kiss you at the same time. It sends you into fits of giggles and squeals. I could listen to your laugh all day.
Halloween was a few days ago. You were a lumberjack. It was awesome.
6 months has truly flown by. I feel as though your dad and I have changed for the better now that you are around. In these short 6 months we have grown from "new parents" into a mother and a father. Having a baby is hard work. Just the other day your dad sent me a text chronicling what is now known as "poo-ocalypse", where you somehow pooped up your back and onto your arms while standing in your exersaucer. You've done it one time to me as well, and I must say it was quite the harrowing experience. But even covered in poop you are still pretty cute.
We love you so much. I'm so excited to see what the next 6 months brings.
Love,
Mom
It's crazy to think that you are 6 months old. This time last year you couldn't even tell I was pregnant, and now I can't imagine life without you.
You now have a personality and I'm glad to say that you are a fun baby. You are always smiling and laughing and you are so inquisitive. If there is something you can grab then you grab it and ultimately it ends up in your mouth. Many a time I've had to dig paper out of your mouth because you've snagged an envelope or magazine without me noticing. It makes everything a little more interesting and everyday I realize the second you can walk we are in big trouble.
Which brings me to my next topic. Laying on your back and just hanging out was so two months ago. You aren't happy unless you are rolling around or sitting up. I'm sure you will be crawling soon, your dad swears that you crawled a little the other day but I've yet to see it so I think he's crazy. We have to be really careful if you are on the couch or bed because you will roll right off. Good thing babies are bouncy....
You've also started to snuggle with us when we hold you. You bury your head in our necks and grab us with both hands. The overwhelming happiness that I get when you do this is indescribable. You especially love it if your dad and I hug and kiss you at the same time. It sends you into fits of giggles and squeals. I could listen to your laugh all day.
Halloween was a few days ago. You were a lumberjack. It was awesome.
6 months has truly flown by. I feel as though your dad and I have changed for the better now that you are around. In these short 6 months we have grown from "new parents" into a mother and a father. Having a baby is hard work. Just the other day your dad sent me a text chronicling what is now known as "poo-ocalypse", where you somehow pooped up your back and onto your arms while standing in your exersaucer. You've done it one time to me as well, and I must say it was quite the harrowing experience. But even covered in poop you are still pretty cute.
We love you so much. I'm so excited to see what the next 6 months brings.
Love,
Mom
Sunday, October 7, 2012
Anniversary Post: 6 years of Marriage
If you haven't already noticed, I love my husband. A lot. So if other people talking about their love for one another grosses you out then look away, it's about to get real icky in here.
Today we celebrate 6 years of marriage, and in 2 months 8 years of being together. When we first met we were head over heals for each other. We both fell hard and were telling our friends that we were going to marry each other with no doubt in our minds. None.
2 years after we met we were tying the knot, and every year after that has been one of growth and love and tests. I know that most people looked at us when we first met and made bets about when the honeymoon phase would wear off. Not because they were being mean, but mostly because we were that obnoxiously in love. Something that good never lasts, at least not typically. Yet here we are with years behind us and still going strong. There were those who said "wait until you live together for "x" number of years." So we did, and have, and it's been great. Then those who said wait until you get married, everything changes. Then we did, and we are, and I still get excited to talk to Brent everyday. Then there were those who said just wait until the honeymoon is over. We waited, it came, and went, and here we are 6 years in and still we are filling our days with 'I love you' and kisses. And of course, the big one, just wait until you have kids. The kid is here, it's no walk in the park, but our marriage has never been stronger. And actually, we take lots of walks in the park....
I don't care if we are annoying or if people read this post and barf on their computer. Our relationship works because we want it to work. There have been times when we could have had 'blow out' fights but we respect each other too much to let that happen. Our relationship, while easier than most, is still something we work at every single day. We want it to work so it does. That's our big secret. We apologize to each other when we do something wrong. We talk things out when there is an issue (or Brent talks until I have no choice but to talk back). We are there for each other, no matter what.
Brent Weedman, I love you. I love that you are constantly introducing me to new things like music and food and life experiences. You push me to be a better person and to grow. I am so thankful for the respect you have for me and the love you have for your son. Thank you for letting me be my weird self and here is to many more year to come.
Today we celebrate 6 years of marriage, and in 2 months 8 years of being together. When we first met we were head over heals for each other. We both fell hard and were telling our friends that we were going to marry each other with no doubt in our minds. None.
2 years after we met we were tying the knot, and every year after that has been one of growth and love and tests. I know that most people looked at us when we first met and made bets about when the honeymoon phase would wear off. Not because they were being mean, but mostly because we were that obnoxiously in love. Something that good never lasts, at least not typically. Yet here we are with years behind us and still going strong. There were those who said "wait until you live together for "x" number of years." So we did, and have, and it's been great. Then those who said wait until you get married, everything changes. Then we did, and we are, and I still get excited to talk to Brent everyday. Then there were those who said just wait until the honeymoon is over. We waited, it came, and went, and here we are 6 years in and still we are filling our days with 'I love you' and kisses. And of course, the big one, just wait until you have kids. The kid is here, it's no walk in the park, but our marriage has never been stronger. And actually, we take lots of walks in the park....
I don't care if we are annoying or if people read this post and barf on their computer. Our relationship works because we want it to work. There have been times when we could have had 'blow out' fights but we respect each other too much to let that happen. Our relationship, while easier than most, is still something we work at every single day. We want it to work so it does. That's our big secret. We apologize to each other when we do something wrong. We talk things out when there is an issue (or Brent talks until I have no choice but to talk back). We are there for each other, no matter what.
Brent Weedman, I love you. I love that you are constantly introducing me to new things like music and food and life experiences. You push me to be a better person and to grow. I am so thankful for the respect you have for me and the love you have for your son. Thank you for letting me be my weird self and here is to many more year to come.
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Natural birthing experience: Guest post!
Not much going on around here, besides William being adorable and awesome. I thought it would be a good time to share my first guest post! Once again, I want my blog to be as helpful as possible to soon to be moms. I have already shared my birthing story so here is another from a friend of mine. This story is beautiful and well written. It is the complete opposite of my own experience and I am so thankful that my friend, Megan, shared it with me and so graciously allowed me to post it for all of you. Enjoy.
Birth Story
This is not the first time I have written out the story of how my daughter came to be in my arms from being in my womb. Every time I write it its a little different. Certain things stand out more than other times. While in labor, you are partially in a haze. Certain things around the edges disappear, while other things are brought into sharper focus. And I found that I had a degree of control over this. I could move things around. Like Debbie Downer nurse. She was sharply in focus at first, but I moved her to blurry land. But we'll get to her later...
I should take this moment to remind you: when giving birth, you see and talk about body parts that are normally covered up. It's also pretty messy. So if you're going to react with "OMG she just said PLACENTA. I think that's a cuss word in Italian." Just. Stop. Reading.
Saturday morning, I wake up and go pee for the 157th time in the past 5 hours. Lo and behold, plop goes my mucus plug. I rush back to the bedroom and grab my Birthing the Bradley Way book and flip to the First Signs of Labor Chapter: "do not get excited if you're mucus plug drops as this is the most uncertain sign of labor beginning." Yeah, too late, I'm excited. But I push that away into the "undelt with emotions" box (I don't handle disappointment well) and decide to go about my day as normal....that is after I rush around like a crazed woman cleaning every inch of the house *just in case* I go into labor today. I know I will be distracted by a mess. I realize this makes me slightly neurotic but I'm ok with that. I tell Justin of aforementioned mucuspluglossage and tell him he needs to stay close today. He has a habit of "going to the record store" and not returning for 8 hours because a train drove by that he decided would be superbly romantic to follow to the next little town. I'm chasing rabbits here: back to labor.
Around lunch time I start to get these curious sensations. They feel a little like menstrual cramps, or constipation...which is a very real option, pooping is hard when you're 9 months pregnant. No, um...pun intended. I read in my book again what a contraction is supposed to feel like, and these sensations don't seem like contractions. I'm only feeling vague discomfort below my belly in my pelvic area. Like CRAMPS. How many times did people tell me "It's not like period cramps". This is a falsehood. So like every good First Time Bradley student, I go through the eat, sleep, walk routine. These ambiguously vague not-contrationy like sensations continue all afternoon. They form a regular rhythm. They increase in intensity. They are still not painful, but enough to make me take notice. "It says my belly is supposed to get hard, I can't feel my belly getting hard!" So I make Justin sit behind me and place his hands on my stomach. I give him a play by play of the rising and falling of these vague and starting to get a little annoying lower abdominal something-or-others. He can't feel my belly getting hard or soft either. Ok fine, its not labor...maybe its braxton hicks? Who knows. All I know is first time pregnant people have lots of: "starting & stopping, nope just kidding" labor deals and I just cannot be bothered to get all worked up if this is going to be nothing. It's still 9 days till my due date and first timers aren't early, they are late. So I continue to putter around trying to ignore the party going on in my lower abdomen. Its unseasonally warm for February. Justin and I spend alot of time outside, and have what I didn't know at the time was to be our last tender moments just the two of us. It was a lovely day. But these pesky weirdo crampy things are getting more intense. I need a distraction. I send Justin out to retrieve Nanny McPhee 2. A good British children's movie always does the trick. While he is gone I start tracking these I-am-now-in-denial-are-contractions. 10 mins apart, 7 mins apart, 6 mins apart. After 2 Redboxes and a Blockbuster, Justin returns with said kids flick. 10 minutes into it we have to turn it off. I am starting to have to concentrate. The movie feels overwhelming. I need darkness and quiet. Then I suddenly remember Laura, my doula made me a lavendar rice bag. Even if I'm not in labor, that sure would feel good on my belly right now. So Justin calls her.
Laura walks in to find me on all fours, bent over the arm of our couch. She cocks her head to the side and sagely states "I'm pretty sure you're having a baby today." It is now 9pm. Ok, I'm convinced. I am in labor. I am having a baby. I am super pumped. It is now officially game time in my brain. Cups of tea are made. (for my super awesome birth team of Faithful Husband and Awesome Doula Friend) buckets and towels are brought near. Pen and paper are retrieved for tracking progress. We are still camped out in the living room. I am able to have conversation and sit up between contractions, but I have to focus and relax my body during them. I try different positions and Laura tries different counter pressures but because the contractions are still bumping and griding UNDER my belly, I find that being on all fours and letting my giant baby carrying tum tum hang freely is what feels best. Unfortunately my arms are already getting tired from holding myself up. Time passes, more quickly than I expected. It is now about 11pm. I get in and out of the bathtub, more tea is made, the lavender rice bag from heaven is continually heated up and stretched over my aching lower belly. Then the puking starts. What? I am NOT in transition. Not even close. Oh, I get to puke off and on the whole time I'm laboring? Swell. I *love* puking. Strangely enough, vomiting is somehow a relief from contraction pressure. It causes those tight muscles to spread upward as I heave. Momentary relief, followed immediately by an even more intense contraction. I'm starting to feel tired. But just as if they read my thoughts, Justin and Laura tell me what a good job I'm doing. How awesome and productive my contractions are. How strong I am. How exciting that we get to meet baby sha soon. A mighty roadblock is erected on my mental path toward doubtfulness. More time passes. More baths and showers, more cups of tea, more puking. I really want to poop. The house remains dark, quiet and peaceful. Justin stays glued to my side, whispering sweetly in my ear how proud he is, holding my hand when needed, giving me space when needed. I am tired. I feel like I could actually sleep. I lay down in bed and fall into a quasi-nap. Briefly losing consciousnesses between contractions. Laura continues to track as she listens to my faint groanings from the living room. As I lay I ponder the journey to the hospital. It is starting to feel insurmountable, moving is so painstakingly difficult. Riding in the car seems like torture. I know that I am not nearing the pushing stage, but I feel its time to go. It is 4am. It is a great effort to get dressed. Had it not been February I probably would have begged to stay naked. Yeah, I was a naked laborer. It baffles me how you could even distinguish whether or not you are dressed while laboring, it is so insignificant. Clothing is definitely in blurry land.
The car ride is not so very torturous thanks to an excellent husband chauffeur. However, I lose track of relaxing and become very stiff on that car ride, which is uncomfortable. I am wheeled up to L & D and we pull up to the registration desk. "MY NAME IS MEGAN SHAFFER, I AM IN ACTIVE LABOR AND I AM PREREGISTERED!" I proudly announced. Desk lady is nonplussed. Apparently there is more paperwork to fill out. This is an outrage. I am ready to get settled, I am ready to get this baby out, how the HELL do you expect me to fill out damn papers?! Oh...my husband can do it while I go to triage? Oh, ok. I have now reached the part of labor I have been most dreading. The hep lock. Really? I know, I know- I'm about to push a human out of my vagina and I'm FREAKING OUT about a needle in my hand. YES!!! Fortunately my triage nurse is kindhearted, my age and also pregnant. She does not look at me like I have a third head when I start to sob about the hep lock and hysterically beg her not to put it in. She has to. I knew it. I turn my head as my juicy veins spray like a Quentin Tarantino movie. Justin almost passes out. A vampire would have had a hey day in there. And then it is over. I now have the horribly distracting thing in my hand. should have had a home birth... My vitals and baby's vitals are checked. We are awesome. Internal exam (bleck HORRIBLE) reveals I am 5 cent and 100% effaced. I forget my station. I never really remember what that is anyway. Sorry Dr. Bradley. I am a little surprised to only be at 5 cent, but I know that doesn't mean anything. Dilation is an unpredictable road. I'm super pumped about my effacement. We fiiiiiiiiinally get to the room. My nurse is wonderful. She is super excited I'm laboring naturally. Brings me a birthing ball, tells me to roam around freely and essentially leaves me alone to work. She offers me a Popsicle. I consider this a moment. I know that a hospital popsicle is toxic waste, but something cold and wet and sweet sounds nice so I accept. It was the best high fructose corn syrup red dye number 5 artificially flavored popsicle I've ever tasted. I feel refreshed, and settled. I think its time to poop. I've wanted to for hours, but pooping brings us to my second biggest labor fear: hemorrhoids. Ok people- I realize my labor fears are kinda silly but when you have that much stage fright about pooping, you have a lot saved up in there and I wanted to be cleared out at this point. Long story short, there is success. Moving on...
Horribly, there is a shift change. In walks Debbie Downer nurse. Friendly Nurse tries to hang around to meet the baby, but I still have just a few hours to go. Debbie Downer nurse is very uncomfortable with the fact that I am going natural and am not constantly hooked up to the fetal heart monitor. I am vaguely aware of her awkwardness but I choose not to receive it. Which is funny to me. I am a people pleaser and am very affected by how everyone feels around me and yet I could care less if Debbie Downer nurse existed or knew who I was or if she was pleased or not. I take a delirious moment to thank God for his grace. Being hooked and unhooked to the monitor is really taxing. I actually enjoy hearing baby's heartbeat and hearing Laura tell me how baller and huge and productive my contractions are but I am having to completely focus on not tensing up through my contractions which are now only giving me a few moments rest in between. Having to move back and forth from monitor chair to wherever else I was in the room is too much at this point. So I end up planted in a hospital armchair for the remainder of my labor. I realize this is not really a great position but I'm too effing tired and contractions are too strong to keep moving. This is one of those "next time I'll do differently moments. While sitting in this chair, my water breaks. It doesn't hurt, and its not as much water as I thought. I am now 8 cent. I feel so thankful that my bag of waters stayed so strong this whole time. I know I am nearly there, that my labor will now speed on to the finish. And boy does it. If I thought I couldn't move before, I am now paralyzed to this horrible chair because my contractions are non-stop wave upon wave. Close to no relief between. Maybe 10 seconds. I am beyond exhausted. I start to feel really weak, and the thought "I don't know if I can do this" finally enters my mind. I am scared to say this out loud because then it would seem more real. Justin and Laura are on either side of me, holding my hands whispering praise. My mom is there too, sitting quietly across the room. She got there at some point...who knows when. Hi mom! My head is falling back in between my now epic contractions. Its hard to stay awake yet I certainly could not sleep right now. But I want to so badly. Just a nap. The pain is intense but not unbearable.The hardest part is its so energy consuming. Is there something I could take that would allow me a 45 min power nap? I do NOT want an epidural, I know its not an option but maybe there's some lesser drug that would just take the edge off? Maybe Laura has some magical herb in her pocket? Hey everyone, Meg is in transition! Meg is completely unaware that she is in transition! Which is also a sign she is in transition! I can't take it anymore, I look imploringly to Justin and Laura and voice my concerns. They are prepared for this. They do not offer drugs, but offer sympathy, encouragement and resolve. This is far more valuable. They also notice that I strategically wait to voice these concerns till after Nurse Annoying has left the room. I also strategically do not look at my mom when I beg for drugs. I know it will be all over then. She will not be able to resist my pitiful and weepy demeanor and I will not be able to resist her motherly care. So I just look at Laura and Justin and shoot their pep talk into my veins and get over the hump. I am impatient. I want to be DONE. I want to meet my baby. Another horrible internal from Nurse Annoying (also referred to as Debbie Downer Nurse. Same lady) who is NOT gentle. I should have had more resolve to say no to internals- another "next time" realization. 9 cent. I decide to do some practice pushes. I am really uncertain of what it means to push. What it will feel like. (Its basically like pooping, expect you're pooping a baby out your vagina. weird, I know) So I'm essentially just grunting and flexing my upper ab muscles but I am doing nothing of the sort close to pushing. Negative Nancy Nurse freaks out and tells me to stop. I decidedly ignore her. Finally, after what seems like an eternity it is announced that we have arrived at 10 cent and I can begin the process of poppin' this kid out!
This gives me new resolve. And I'm happy to finally DO something besides sit in a chair and breathe through contractions. I will say this: as much as I desired a midwife and unfortunately that didn't work out for me this time, my obgyn was awesome. She was completely supportive of me working with my body. She never told me when to push, only helpful tips on how to push effectively, and LOTS of encouragement. She even put Nurse Annoying in her place a couple times. heheh. Laura and Justin are still on either side of me, holding my hands. I could not do this without them. I look into their faces for the first time in what seems like years and I see pride. I look at my husband positively beaming at me, tears running down his cheek. I can do this. I'm going to have this babe in my arms soon. Pushing feels productive. And painful. Some people are blessed with glorious hormonal numbness of the vag during pushing, I was sadly not possessed with this gift. I could feel that ring of fire. And frankly I didn't care. The doctor tells me how impressed she is with my babe's strong and courageous heart beat.
"We see hair! Lots of hair" *so* glad all that heartburn had a purpose.
"Just a few more pushes!"
And finally, after what seems like years, and yet minutes, I have a child on my belly, rather than in. This babe is so warm, and more sturdy than I imagined. Perfection. But we STILL don't know the gender! I have to ask- it's a girl. A daughter! I laugh because no one, not a soul, thought I was having a girl. A grand surprise indeed. All agony is forgotton, but I am tapped out. All the capillaries in my face are busted. I probably have vomit in my hair. I need someone to invent a new word for exhausted to describe the state of my body. But I feel euphoric. I feel I could dance. No, not really. I feel I could not move, but my heart was dancing. I love her. I love her. Its a love I've never experienced before. It's a love beyond description. My heart feels cramped in my cheast, like it needs to spill over and be shared. My sweet daughter, can I share my heart with you? I long to give you some of this love, for you to know it. They say she's not breathing as well as they want, and I need to be stitched up but I am at peace. That beautiful God given peaces that goes beyond understanding.I know she is fine. Justin whips his shirt off to give her skin to skin while my battle worn jay jay is repaired. She immediately starts to root on daddy. Smart girl. My Ireland Ruth. I think of my dad and how proud he would be of her. How proud he would be of me. I have a moment of sadness, but nothing can stop this moment from being absolute bliss. I feel empowered. I just did that. I don't particularly want to do it again soon, but man, I actually did it! I feel at home, at ease. I am a mother. It's like my calling has been realized. I never thought about it before, but this is what I want to do the rest of my life. Which is good, since children are a permanent fixture.
Ireland Ruth Shaffer: 8 pounds even, 19 inches long. Born at 10:20am February 20th after a full 23 1/2 hours of labor. Welcome home little one, welcome home.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Rabble Rabble
I don't rant often, but I'd like to rant a little today.
I can't really tell if it really is a big deal, or if I'm just so submerged in it that I can't see out of this little world, but what is the deal with breastfeeding beng so controversial? What is the deal, people?
I thought about typing out a big long blog about breastfeeding and how it is amazing for baby and mom and it is what is supposed to happen. Then I realized the people who already know that don't need to be told again, and those with issues about breastfeeding, whether it is a problem with doing it in public or whatever, are just uneducated about the facts and they can google them if they are so inclined.
What I've decided to say is this: Shut up. Everyone, shut it. Nursing in public is NO BIG DEAL. If you don't want to see a woman's boob and you are staring at her while she gets situated to feed her child then LOOK AWAY. Quit staring. And don't give me the "I can't help but look, it's right in front of me." You can look elsewhere, with your eyeballs that you control with your brain. Move them away from the mother who is breastfeeding. I PROMISE that she does not want you to stare at her boob either, she just wants to feed her kid without hiding in the car or pumping that day so that she can bring a bottle with her while she is out. Women who are brave enough to feed in public aren't doing it to make a point or make you uncomfortable, they are doing it because their baby needs to eat and they happen to be out. They do not need to work out their schedule and stress because you have nothing better to do then give mean glances. JEEZ people. Also, if there is a woman at your place of work that pumps and you see her walking to put her pumped milk in the fridge don't make a big deal out of it. We all know that you know what just happened. She sat in a room hooked up to a machine that pumped her breasts. She doesn't want to sit in that room hooked up to that machine, but she does it because she is making sure that her baby has the best possible nutrition. Pumping sucks. So don't throw out any cow jokes, don't make jokes about "drinking the milk" or "putting it in coffee" or anything along those lines. And don't make faces or say "that's gross", or "yuck". What are you, fucking 6 years old? Are you auditioning for the sequel to the movie Mean Girls?
Breastfeeding is hard enough without society downing it all of the time. It is hard, it is emotional, it is intense. If you have not breastfed a child or been around a breastfeeding mother then I do not expect you to understand. The emotional bond that comes with breastfeeding is raw and NO ONE should judge or comment on any other woman's breastfeeding relationship with her child.
Once again, I think I may just be too close to the situation. Some of my friends may read this and think I've lost my mind. But what I'm saying means something to me. So, if you have a friend, a family member, or co-worker who is breastfeeding, then be supportive. It is that simple.
I can't really tell if it really is a big deal, or if I'm just so submerged in it that I can't see out of this little world, but what is the deal with breastfeeding beng so controversial? What is the deal, people?
I thought about typing out a big long blog about breastfeeding and how it is amazing for baby and mom and it is what is supposed to happen. Then I realized the people who already know that don't need to be told again, and those with issues about breastfeeding, whether it is a problem with doing it in public or whatever, are just uneducated about the facts and they can google them if they are so inclined.
What I've decided to say is this: Shut up. Everyone, shut it. Nursing in public is NO BIG DEAL. If you don't want to see a woman's boob and you are staring at her while she gets situated to feed her child then LOOK AWAY. Quit staring. And don't give me the "I can't help but look, it's right in front of me." You can look elsewhere, with your eyeballs that you control with your brain. Move them away from the mother who is breastfeeding. I PROMISE that she does not want you to stare at her boob either, she just wants to feed her kid without hiding in the car or pumping that day so that she can bring a bottle with her while she is out. Women who are brave enough to feed in public aren't doing it to make a point or make you uncomfortable, they are doing it because their baby needs to eat and they happen to be out. They do not need to work out their schedule and stress because you have nothing better to do then give mean glances. JEEZ people. Also, if there is a woman at your place of work that pumps and you see her walking to put her pumped milk in the fridge don't make a big deal out of it. We all know that you know what just happened. She sat in a room hooked up to a machine that pumped her breasts. She doesn't want to sit in that room hooked up to that machine, but she does it because she is making sure that her baby has the best possible nutrition. Pumping sucks. So don't throw out any cow jokes, don't make jokes about "drinking the milk" or "putting it in coffee" or anything along those lines. And don't make faces or say "that's gross", or "yuck". What are you, fucking 6 years old? Are you auditioning for the sequel to the movie Mean Girls?
Breastfeeding is hard enough without society downing it all of the time. It is hard, it is emotional, it is intense. If you have not breastfed a child or been around a breastfeeding mother then I do not expect you to understand. The emotional bond that comes with breastfeeding is raw and NO ONE should judge or comment on any other woman's breastfeeding relationship with her child.
Once again, I think I may just be too close to the situation. Some of my friends may read this and think I've lost my mind. But what I'm saying means something to me. So, if you have a friend, a family member, or co-worker who is breastfeeding, then be supportive. It is that simple.
Friday, September 7, 2012
4 month checkup (18 weeks)
Will had his 4 month check up today! The time flies, doesn't it? He weighed in at 16 lbs 12 oz, 25 inches long, and size giant head. No, seriously, still in the 100th percentile for head size.
Today we talked solids. When to introduce food, what food to introduce, and how long before he can start drinking beer*.
Brent and I had lots of questions about food. Since we met 8 years ago we have been on a food journey. We have gone from being not very healthy eaters, to vegetarian, and now trying out the paleo diet which is basically eating actual food and nothing processed. Crazy, right? During the past eight years we have learned so much and are looking forward to introducing our love and understanding of food on to our kids. To not only eat variety, but to also understand where food comes from and exactly what you are eating.
Our first concern was with rice cereal. We wanted to know why it is the first choice for solid foods. We were weary because rice is not the most nutritional thing and we wanted to avoid giving Will "filler" foods. The doctor explained that it is easy on there sensitive guts and gets them used to swallowing foods. Makes sense. We then went on to when to introduce other foods. You are supposed to introduce one food at a time and feed only that food for 3-4 days to make sure they don't have an allergic reaction to it. She recommended starting with green vegetables, then moving on to other colored veggies, then fruits. She recommends fruits last because we know that kids (or people in general) will eat the sugary stuff. She then advised that around 9 months you can start giving them whatever it is that you are eating. Her kids were eating Indian food by 9 months. I didn't ask what those diapers looked like....
I am excited to start solids even though it means that Will is continuing to grow up. Dammit. We plan on starting at 6 months of age (24 weeks).
Will also got his second set of vaccines today. He cried but pulled himself together after a hug from me and a smile from dad. What a brave boy!
Other things that have happened this week: TEETH! The top middle teeth have finally cut through, marking the end of a tough week. These have been much more painful for him than the bottom two. SLEEP! Although we had 4 rough nights due to teething he surprised us by sleeping 3 full nights back to back. Not a peep from 8pm-8am. The past few nights he has been waking up his typical one time to nurse, but those 12 hour nights were a welcome surprise! Thanks buddy! MOVING! Will has been getting better and better at controlling his movements. He is very close to sitting up on his own and loves to stand (with help from us of course). Tummy time is now squirmy time as he kicks and wriggles trying to get away.
*turns out babies can have beer at the age of 21 years.
Today we talked solids. When to introduce food, what food to introduce, and how long before he can start drinking beer*.
Brent and I had lots of questions about food. Since we met 8 years ago we have been on a food journey. We have gone from being not very healthy eaters, to vegetarian, and now trying out the paleo diet which is basically eating actual food and nothing processed. Crazy, right? During the past eight years we have learned so much and are looking forward to introducing our love and understanding of food on to our kids. To not only eat variety, but to also understand where food comes from and exactly what you are eating.
Our first concern was with rice cereal. We wanted to know why it is the first choice for solid foods. We were weary because rice is not the most nutritional thing and we wanted to avoid giving Will "filler" foods. The doctor explained that it is easy on there sensitive guts and gets them used to swallowing foods. Makes sense. We then went on to when to introduce other foods. You are supposed to introduce one food at a time and feed only that food for 3-4 days to make sure they don't have an allergic reaction to it. She recommended starting with green vegetables, then moving on to other colored veggies, then fruits. She recommends fruits last because we know that kids (or people in general) will eat the sugary stuff. She then advised that around 9 months you can start giving them whatever it is that you are eating. Her kids were eating Indian food by 9 months. I didn't ask what those diapers looked like....
I am excited to start solids even though it means that Will is continuing to grow up. Dammit. We plan on starting at 6 months of age (24 weeks).
Will also got his second set of vaccines today. He cried but pulled himself together after a hug from me and a smile from dad. What a brave boy!
Other things that have happened this week: TEETH! The top middle teeth have finally cut through, marking the end of a tough week. These have been much more painful for him than the bottom two. SLEEP! Although we had 4 rough nights due to teething he surprised us by sleeping 3 full nights back to back. Not a peep from 8pm-8am. The past few nights he has been waking up his typical one time to nurse, but those 12 hour nights were a welcome surprise! Thanks buddy! MOVING! Will has been getting better and better at controlling his movements. He is very close to sitting up on his own and loves to stand (with help from us of course). Tummy time is now squirmy time as he kicks and wriggles trying to get away.
*turns out babies can have beer at the age of 21 years.
Monday, September 3, 2012
Perfection
After having Will I always wondered how someone could have more kids. I know, it sounds terrible, but it's the truth. The first month of his life was hard, exhausting, and overwhelming. Why would anyone want to do this twice? Or three or four or oh my goodness five times? Were they crazy?
Then things calmed down and I finally began sleeping again and I realized I could do it again. Definitely.
There are many reasons that having a baby is awesome, but let me pick just one for you.
It's that moment right before bed. That moment when you are rocking them to sleep in your arms and they are perfectly content. Everything they could ever possibly want or need is there. They are safe in your arms, with no worries or cares or problems. It is perfection. It's a happiness and love that I can't even begin to describe. This moment is so fleeting that I ache to think it will one day end. And as much as I look forward to watching him grow there is a part of me that will always long for the times where all Will wants or needs is to be in my arms.
Then things calmed down and I finally began sleeping again and I realized I could do it again. Definitely.
There are many reasons that having a baby is awesome, but let me pick just one for you.
It's that moment right before bed. That moment when you are rocking them to sleep in your arms and they are perfectly content. Everything they could ever possibly want or need is there. They are safe in your arms, with no worries or cares or problems. It is perfection. It's a happiness and love that I can't even begin to describe. This moment is so fleeting that I ache to think it will one day end. And as much as I look forward to watching him grow there is a part of me that will always long for the times where all Will wants or needs is to be in my arms.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Another post about sleep: Crib edition
When you have a baby most of your life revolves around sleep. Getting the baby to sleep, where they sleep, how long they sleep, how often you sleep, etc, etc. All you think about is sleep. I had made the decision from the get go to have Will sleep in a co-sleeper by our bed. I wanted him close by to minimize crying and make sure he stayed alive through the night. I was a big fan of constantly checking him since he was right by us, which I thought was calming my nerves, but may have been making me crazier. I wasn't sure when we would switch him to his crib but I wanted it to be gradual and on his terms to minimize stress.
I did some research to see when other moms make the switch and found that it really depends on you and your baby. Some do it during the first few months, while others co-sleep until there child is ready to move to their bed on their terms. Some even start the baby out in the crib after bringing them home from the hospital. I first set a goal for having him in our room for 3 months, then possibly start the transition.
Three months came, and three months went. At that 12 week mark I wasn't ready to move him out of our room. Even just the mention of it gave me anxiety. Brent would say something like "let's try him in his crib tonight" and I would scowl. My crazy mom hormones would flare up and I would think to myself "might as well just let him sleep in the shed!". Brent must have felt the tension and would let the subject go without pushing.
Around 14 weeks I started to notice he was outgrowing his rock and play sleeper. He would move around a lot at night and slide down causing him to be bunched up. Since he is a bigger than average baby I figured the switch to his much roomier crib was imminent and began preparing myself. Oh yeah, and preparing the baby. But mostly preparing myself.
We started by doing naps in the crib. He would usually wake up pretty quickly and we were lucky to get a solid 45 minutes out of him. After about 10 solid days of crib naps I let him sleep from 8pm until 11 or 12 in the crib, then would wake him up, nurse him, and switch him to our bedside. Then, at 16 weeks old we made the full jump. I chose a week where I only had half days at work so that I could get some extra sleep if he was up more than usual through the night.
Night 1: Rocked to sleep around 8, then he was up at 11:30, 2, 5, and up at 7:30 screaming his head off. He never wakes up sad so this kind of bummed me out and a part of my mom brain was telling me that he wasn't ready for the switch. My logical brain then reminded me that it was only night one and I need to chill out. I would still consider it a successful night.
Night 2: Rocked to sleep at 8, then he was up at 2:30, 5:30, then up at 7:30 with a smile on his face. Better.
Night 3: Rocked to sleep at 8:30, up at 5:45, then up at 9am. Did you catch that? Asleep at 8:30.....then awake at 5:45am. That is 9 HOURS OF SLEEP. What changed? I assume mostly that he was just getting used to being in the crib, and also I wedged him between a pillow and a blanket so that he wouldn't flail his arms. and wake himself up. Nothing near his face, just something that made him feel more secure if he did wake up.
Night 4: Rocked to sleep at 9, up at 4:45, then up at 9. This is the day I decided my baby is an f'ing rock star. Pardon my language, but seriously. My baby is the best baby.
So far he has been pretty consistent. There are times when he wakes up and starts to make noise. If he does this we will quietly go into the room, put a hand on his chest, and wait for him to go back to sleep. I want him to know that we are always there before he gets upset and this seems to be working well with him. He will stare at us and slowly drift off to sleep again. Once again, I am very aware that things could change next week or even tonight for that matter, but I consider our transition to crib a MAJOR success. It was harder for me than I ever thought it would be, but he loves to stretch out in his bed. My advice is to take your time and do what is comfortable for you. If you aren't ready then don't push it because you will only stress and your baby will know something is up. I will say that it is nice to have our room back and that one on one time with Brent where we don't have to whisper or tip toe around.
I did some research to see when other moms make the switch and found that it really depends on you and your baby. Some do it during the first few months, while others co-sleep until there child is ready to move to their bed on their terms. Some even start the baby out in the crib after bringing them home from the hospital. I first set a goal for having him in our room for 3 months, then possibly start the transition.
Three months came, and three months went. At that 12 week mark I wasn't ready to move him out of our room. Even just the mention of it gave me anxiety. Brent would say something like "let's try him in his crib tonight" and I would scowl. My crazy mom hormones would flare up and I would think to myself "might as well just let him sleep in the shed!". Brent must have felt the tension and would let the subject go without pushing.
Around 14 weeks I started to notice he was outgrowing his rock and play sleeper. He would move around a lot at night and slide down causing him to be bunched up. Since he is a bigger than average baby I figured the switch to his much roomier crib was imminent and began preparing myself. Oh yeah, and preparing the baby. But mostly preparing myself.
We started by doing naps in the crib. He would usually wake up pretty quickly and we were lucky to get a solid 45 minutes out of him. After about 10 solid days of crib naps I let him sleep from 8pm until 11 or 12 in the crib, then would wake him up, nurse him, and switch him to our bedside. Then, at 16 weeks old we made the full jump. I chose a week where I only had half days at work so that I could get some extra sleep if he was up more than usual through the night.
Night 1: Rocked to sleep around 8, then he was up at 11:30, 2, 5, and up at 7:30 screaming his head off. He never wakes up sad so this kind of bummed me out and a part of my mom brain was telling me that he wasn't ready for the switch. My logical brain then reminded me that it was only night one and I need to chill out. I would still consider it a successful night.
Night 2: Rocked to sleep at 8, then he was up at 2:30, 5:30, then up at 7:30 with a smile on his face. Better.
Night 3: Rocked to sleep at 8:30, up at 5:45, then up at 9am. Did you catch that? Asleep at 8:30.....then awake at 5:45am. That is 9 HOURS OF SLEEP. What changed? I assume mostly that he was just getting used to being in the crib, and also I wedged him between a pillow and a blanket so that he wouldn't flail his arms. and wake himself up. Nothing near his face, just something that made him feel more secure if he did wake up.
Night 4: Rocked to sleep at 9, up at 4:45, then up at 9. This is the day I decided my baby is an f'ing rock star. Pardon my language, but seriously. My baby is the best baby.
So far he has been pretty consistent. There are times when he wakes up and starts to make noise. If he does this we will quietly go into the room, put a hand on his chest, and wait for him to go back to sleep. I want him to know that we are always there before he gets upset and this seems to be working well with him. He will stare at us and slowly drift off to sleep again. Once again, I am very aware that things could change next week or even tonight for that matter, but I consider our transition to crib a MAJOR success. It was harder for me than I ever thought it would be, but he loves to stretch out in his bed. My advice is to take your time and do what is comfortable for you. If you aren't ready then don't push it because you will only stress and your baby will know something is up. I will say that it is nice to have our room back and that one on one time with Brent where we don't have to whisper or tip toe around.
Monday, August 13, 2012
Animals
I was thinking the other day about our pets and William. I realized that more than likely these dogs and cats will be a foggy memory in Will's life. In reality they have been through so much with Brent and I that I can't imagine life without them. As they age I begin to wonder what Will is going to remember about them. I hope that he can get some fond memories with these guys before they pass on. And William, if that's not possible, let me tell you about our pets.
First it is important to understand that I love animals. Most people do, and If they don't then they are probably weirdos, but I like to think my affinity for them is different than most. I love animals so much that I have made a career out of caring for them, and I love my job. Thankfully your father loves animals too, and throughout the years he put up with me bringing home dogs and cats left and right. Most animals were fosters who were only with us briefly before going on to their forever homes, but some stuck.
Maki
When I moved in with your father Maki came with me. She had been abandoned at the animal hospital I worked at when she was only 8 weeks old. He came to my work and I brought her up to him and told him that she needed a home. She wrapped her little puppy dog arms around his neck and the rest is history. Maki has a special place in my heart. She is sweet and calm but doesn't go out of her way to make new friends. She loves the people she loves deeply and likes her routine. If something is askew she worries and frets. Maki has been with us from the beginning. She has made the move from apartment to apartment and house to house. She was sitting on the couch when your dad proposed and she was at my feet as we planned our wedding. When I took the pregnancy test to see if you were coming she paced the floor with me. She has sat by my side through tears and through joy. In the year that you were born she will be 9. It pains me to think that she is old, and if I could thank her for being such a good dog I would. I hope that you can look back and remember her in some way.
Maebe
Maebe was a spry 6 week old kitten when we brought her home. A friend that I worked with found a litter of kittens under her house and brought them into work. They were all pretty cute, but Maebe stuck out because of the orange dot on her head. Your father wasn't a huge cat fan, but I talked him into bringing her home. She won him over quickly and her and Maki really like hanging out. To this day they still snuggle with each other. As far as cats go, she's a good one. She turned 8 this year.
Ricky
Ricky is your father through and through. We rescued him after he was abandoned at another clinic. He is a big tough guy but super sweet. He is goofy and funny and sure thinks you are special. He likes to give you kisses but we have to watch him because he gets very excited and won't stop kissing you. Today you were laying on the bed and he wanted to be touching you so he almost laid on your head. Ricky is five this year, and I think once you start crawling and walking you two will be the best of friends.
Shirley
Shirley is very,...peculiar. I bottle raised her and she turned out a little crazy. She LOVES me, but usually hides under the bed when other people are around or if your dad is home alone. I was worried that she would lose it when you came around, but she has actually become a little nicer. She really likes you and has let you pet her on multiple occasions. Cats tend to live longer than dogs so I have a feeling that you will actually remember Shirley and Maebe more than the pups.
First it is important to understand that I love animals. Most people do, and If they don't then they are probably weirdos, but I like to think my affinity for them is different than most. I love animals so much that I have made a career out of caring for them, and I love my job. Thankfully your father loves animals too, and throughout the years he put up with me bringing home dogs and cats left and right. Most animals were fosters who were only with us briefly before going on to their forever homes, but some stuck.
Maki
When I moved in with your father Maki came with me. She had been abandoned at the animal hospital I worked at when she was only 8 weeks old. He came to my work and I brought her up to him and told him that she needed a home. She wrapped her little puppy dog arms around his neck and the rest is history. Maki has a special place in my heart. She is sweet and calm but doesn't go out of her way to make new friends. She loves the people she loves deeply and likes her routine. If something is askew she worries and frets. Maki has been with us from the beginning. She has made the move from apartment to apartment and house to house. She was sitting on the couch when your dad proposed and she was at my feet as we planned our wedding. When I took the pregnancy test to see if you were coming she paced the floor with me. She has sat by my side through tears and through joy. In the year that you were born she will be 9. It pains me to think that she is old, and if I could thank her for being such a good dog I would. I hope that you can look back and remember her in some way.
Maebe
Maebe was a spry 6 week old kitten when we brought her home. A friend that I worked with found a litter of kittens under her house and brought them into work. They were all pretty cute, but Maebe stuck out because of the orange dot on her head. Your father wasn't a huge cat fan, but I talked him into bringing her home. She won him over quickly and her and Maki really like hanging out. To this day they still snuggle with each other. As far as cats go, she's a good one. She turned 8 this year.
Ricky
Ricky is your father through and through. We rescued him after he was abandoned at another clinic. He is a big tough guy but super sweet. He is goofy and funny and sure thinks you are special. He likes to give you kisses but we have to watch him because he gets very excited and won't stop kissing you. Today you were laying on the bed and he wanted to be touching you so he almost laid on your head. Ricky is five this year, and I think once you start crawling and walking you two will be the best of friends.
Shirley
Shirley is very,...peculiar. I bottle raised her and she turned out a little crazy. She LOVES me, but usually hides under the bed when other people are around or if your dad is home alone. I was worried that she would lose it when you came around, but she has actually become a little nicer. She really likes you and has let you pet her on multiple occasions. Cats tend to live longer than dogs so I have a feeling that you will actually remember Shirley and Maebe more than the pups.
So that's what you are surrounded by. Our house will never be without animals, so I hope that you love them as much as we do.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Too much information
Seriously. Boys probably don't want to read this. So if you are a boy and you do read this and you think "gross" then you can't say I didn't warn you.
Ok, now that the boys are gone I'll tell you my story. It all started this past weekend. I had been all mopey and down in the dumps for no good reason. I would tear up at the drop of a hat and just wasn't in a good place. It all came to a head on Monday night. After a long day at work I came home and was even more tired than usual. I was sad and exhausted and bummed. I don't remember exactly why I started to cry, but I did. There I was crying on the couch with poor Brent wanting to help but not knowing exactly what to do. I told him that I am just overwhelmed and I've been so sleepy and sad but I can't figure out why. We had a long discussion and began talking about how it could be post Partum depression and we discussed ways that Brent could help me to make sure I take care of myself. Have I mentioned that my husband is amazing? Anyway, I went to bed that night thinking that maybe I was struggling a little and tried to get my head in the right place.
The next morning I woke up feeling good. I went to work and was feeling great, when all of the sudden it happened. I started my period. Then it hit me. That sneaky bitch. I haven't had my period for over a year now so I wasn't even thinking that could have been it. When breastfeeding you actually prolong the time before starting your period again after pregnancy. Some woman go months with nothing, so you never know when it will come back. I have never been so relieved to start, well, ever. It explains my tiredness, my sadness, and my mood swings. Here I thought I might be going off the deep end and it was just damn mother nature being her usual jerk self.
So that's my story. I do know that I still need to make sure I take care of myself, but it makes me feel so much better that it was just normal symptoms.
Ok, now that the boys are gone I'll tell you my story. It all started this past weekend. I had been all mopey and down in the dumps for no good reason. I would tear up at the drop of a hat and just wasn't in a good place. It all came to a head on Monday night. After a long day at work I came home and was even more tired than usual. I was sad and exhausted and bummed. I don't remember exactly why I started to cry, but I did. There I was crying on the couch with poor Brent wanting to help but not knowing exactly what to do. I told him that I am just overwhelmed and I've been so sleepy and sad but I can't figure out why. We had a long discussion and began talking about how it could be post Partum depression and we discussed ways that Brent could help me to make sure I take care of myself. Have I mentioned that my husband is amazing? Anyway, I went to bed that night thinking that maybe I was struggling a little and tried to get my head in the right place.
The next morning I woke up feeling good. I went to work and was feeling great, when all of the sudden it happened. I started my period. Then it hit me. That sneaky bitch. I haven't had my period for over a year now so I wasn't even thinking that could have been it. When breastfeeding you actually prolong the time before starting your period again after pregnancy. Some woman go months with nothing, so you never know when it will come back. I have never been so relieved to start, well, ever. It explains my tiredness, my sadness, and my mood swings. Here I thought I might be going off the deep end and it was just damn mother nature being her usual jerk self.
So that's my story. I do know that I still need to make sure I take care of myself, but it makes me feel so much better that it was just normal symptoms.
Friday, August 3, 2012
Teething and a Giraffe
I had not read much about teething. All that I knew was that it normally begins sometime between 4-6 months and one of the first signs is drooling. When Will started drooling like crazy around 11 weeks I didn't think anything of it. Then, at 12 weeks old, we realized he had a tooth erupting. Brent mentioned that earlier in the week Will was chewing on his finger and he felt something sharp. When he told me I thought he was crazy. I opened Will's mouth and sure enough there it was on the bottom row.
My first thought was something about hoping he doesn't bite my nipple off, and my second was to figure out how to keep him comfortable.
I began researching what to do. It wasn't as easy as giving him a teething ring and letting him be. At only 12 weeks he isn't coordinated enough to hold something and put it in his mouth to chew. He can hold things and he can chew things, but the combination is still beyond him. I had a bunch of teethers from the baby shower but they were too big around for him to even hold. I then read online that you could tie a washcloth into knots for them to chew. This worked decently because I could lay the washcloth around his face and he could push it into his mouth. Still, he wouldn't chew on it for very long. Another article said that I could use one of those mesh things that you put fruit in for older babies to chew but instead of fruit fill it with frozen breast milk. That way they can have something cold to soothe the gums and swallowing the breast milk wouldn't hurt anything. I had a few of the mesh things from our shower so I gave it a try. After a few minutes of me shoving it into his mouth and Will looking at me like I had lost my mind I gave up. I think it was too cold for him at this age.
Well crap. Sometimes a pacifier seems to help, but he won't keep it in. Over the past week we have had more baby meltdowns then he has had in the past 3 months combined. He will scream his giant head off and once we calm him down he shoves his hand in his mouth and rubs his gums. I feel terribly for him. Besides the fussiness his sleep pattern hasn't been thrown off too bad. Last night was the first night that he has ever gotten up at 4am and STAYED up. Usually he wakes me up to nurse and passes out while nursing. I can carry him and lay him down without him even opening his eyes. But last night he stopped nursing and was wide awake. Not necessarily fussy, just restless. Meanwhile, it was everything I could do to keep my eyes open. After an hour of trying to get him back to sleep I called for backup and tagged Brent in. I'm so lucky to have a great husband, he took over and got him to sleep while I passed back out.
Today I did finally find something that he can hold AND chew. It's called Sophie the Giraffe and it is deemed as the best teething toy. Actually I didn't get the original Sophie, but a smaller version with a handle. The reason I didn't get the original is because it squeaks like a dog toy. I don't even let my dogs have squeaky toys, let alone my baby. I really like this teether because it is small enough for his fat little hand to hold, lightweight, and it is rubber so it doesn't slip out of his hand and he loves the texture. I'm hoping this little giraffe has saved the day.
Teething has been the first event where I realized Will is growing up. Yes, I realize that he is still only 3 months old, but getting teeth is kind of a big deal. One day I'm going to wake up and he will have a full set of teeth and a beard (probably next week) and I'll be bummed. The other day I caught myself saying "who told you that you could grow up?", and I thought of how many times my mom had said that to me. Yet here I am, a grown ass woman with a toothy man baby.
My first thought was something about hoping he doesn't bite my nipple off, and my second was to figure out how to keep him comfortable.
I began researching what to do. It wasn't as easy as giving him a teething ring and letting him be. At only 12 weeks he isn't coordinated enough to hold something and put it in his mouth to chew. He can hold things and he can chew things, but the combination is still beyond him. I had a bunch of teethers from the baby shower but they were too big around for him to even hold. I then read online that you could tie a washcloth into knots for them to chew. This worked decently because I could lay the washcloth around his face and he could push it into his mouth. Still, he wouldn't chew on it for very long. Another article said that I could use one of those mesh things that you put fruit in for older babies to chew but instead of fruit fill it with frozen breast milk. That way they can have something cold to soothe the gums and swallowing the breast milk wouldn't hurt anything. I had a few of the mesh things from our shower so I gave it a try. After a few minutes of me shoving it into his mouth and Will looking at me like I had lost my mind I gave up. I think it was too cold for him at this age.
Well crap. Sometimes a pacifier seems to help, but he won't keep it in. Over the past week we have had more baby meltdowns then he has had in the past 3 months combined. He will scream his giant head off and once we calm him down he shoves his hand in his mouth and rubs his gums. I feel terribly for him. Besides the fussiness his sleep pattern hasn't been thrown off too bad. Last night was the first night that he has ever gotten up at 4am and STAYED up. Usually he wakes me up to nurse and passes out while nursing. I can carry him and lay him down without him even opening his eyes. But last night he stopped nursing and was wide awake. Not necessarily fussy, just restless. Meanwhile, it was everything I could do to keep my eyes open. After an hour of trying to get him back to sleep I called for backup and tagged Brent in. I'm so lucky to have a great husband, he took over and got him to sleep while I passed back out.
Today I did finally find something that he can hold AND chew. It's called Sophie the Giraffe and it is deemed as the best teething toy. Actually I didn't get the original Sophie, but a smaller version with a handle. The reason I didn't get the original is because it squeaks like a dog toy. I don't even let my dogs have squeaky toys, let alone my baby. I really like this teether because it is small enough for his fat little hand to hold, lightweight, and it is rubber so it doesn't slip out of his hand and he loves the texture. I'm hoping this little giraffe has saved the day.
Teething has been the first event where I realized Will is growing up. Yes, I realize that he is still only 3 months old, but getting teeth is kind of a big deal. One day I'm going to wake up and he will have a full set of teeth and a beard (probably next week) and I'll be bummed. The other day I caught myself saying "who told you that you could grow up?", and I thought of how many times my mom had said that to me. Yet here I am, a grown ass woman with a toothy man baby.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Missing In Action
I haven't posted in 11 days. Turns out being a mom is pretty time consuming. I've started three other posts but only get about half way through before I get sleepy and give up. I go back and read what I've written and it's neither interesting nor funny. My brain is turning into mom mush.
Some highlights to hold you over:
Baby is giant. And teething already. And just really cute.
I am staying busy with work. Once again thankful that I have three day weekends to enjoy with Brent and Will.
And now I'm tired again. Will has been sleeping like a champ, which is awesome, however I am still exhausted during the work week.
I promise I'll post more when I can think of something interesting! Here is a picture to hold you over.
Some highlights to hold you over:
Baby is giant. And teething already. And just really cute.
I am staying busy with work. Once again thankful that I have three day weekends to enjoy with Brent and Will.
And now I'm tired again. Will has been sleeping like a champ, which is awesome, however I am still exhausted during the work week.
I promise I'll post more when I can think of something interesting! Here is a picture to hold you over.
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Note Number Two
William,
You are still a really cool baby. Today you are 104 days old.
Turns out you are teething already. It's not unheard of at this age, but it's pretty young to be getting your first tooth. You haven't been too fussy but have had a few epic meltdowns. This might sound weird but even when you cry it is pretty cute.
Your favorite thing to do right now is stand while we hold you up. You post your fat baby legs up and smile so big. It's pretty adorable. You also love being talked to and you make the best facial expressions. You'll be talking before we know it. And you love the show Yo Gabba Gabba. I don't want to melt your brain by letting you watch TV, but this crazy show will teach you all kinds of things. Today we learned how to be polite and say things like excuse me and thank you. Being polite is super important and you are going to hear that from your dad and I a lot.
Right now I am holding you while you nap. You love to grab my shirt while you sleep and I love kissing your forehead. I kiss your forehead because it is giant. Sorry, you got that from your dad and I. You might grow into yours, I wasn't so lucky. One day someone might call it a "five head", but that's ok. No matter how big it is you will always be cooler than all the other kids for sure. Anyway, these moments when we are snuggled up together are good for my heart, knowing that you are happy and comfy in my arms.
This morning we went for a walk with Mamaw and you slept the whole time, then we had a dance party with the Yo Gabba Gabba gang (Brobee is your dad and I's favorite). After that I gave you a bath and you splashed around a lot today. You love baths and hate when they are over. We wrap you up in a towel and once you realize there is no more warm water you usually cry.
Later today we are eating lunch with the Sharp family. They have a daughter, Millie, who is a year and a half older than you. I'm sure you will be friends with Millie since we are so close with her parents. In fact, you will be surrounded by little girls for a while. You met baby Clementine a few weeks ago, and our friends Peter & Vikki and Alisa & Bryan are both having girls in October. But that's ok, you'll learn quick that girls make the world go round. You will have a lot of strong role models in your life, both male and female, and I'm very thankful for that.
Right now we are trying to get you to sleep on your back more, you are doing ok but aren't quite sleeping through the night yet. That's fine, because I know soon enough I will have to drag your butt out of bed in the mornings for school/practice/games.
I'm rambling. Once again we love you so much, even when you throw fits and even when it is 2am and you want to be awake. Your dad and I slept a whole lot before you came, so it's all good.
Love,
Mom
P.S. You drool a lot right now because you are teething. You drool worse then Ricky the dog. And if you have been drooling all day your cheeks smell funky. Yesterday your dad was holding you and kissed your cheeks, then pulled away because you had baby stink face. Of course you just smiled the whole time. You thankfully like having your face washed. And yes, you still fart a lot. Our house is a bucket of farts between us three and the dogs.
You are still a really cool baby. Today you are 104 days old.
Turns out you are teething already. It's not unheard of at this age, but it's pretty young to be getting your first tooth. You haven't been too fussy but have had a few epic meltdowns. This might sound weird but even when you cry it is pretty cute.
Your favorite thing to do right now is stand while we hold you up. You post your fat baby legs up and smile so big. It's pretty adorable. You also love being talked to and you make the best facial expressions. You'll be talking before we know it. And you love the show Yo Gabba Gabba. I don't want to melt your brain by letting you watch TV, but this crazy show will teach you all kinds of things. Today we learned how to be polite and say things like excuse me and thank you. Being polite is super important and you are going to hear that from your dad and I a lot.
Right now I am holding you while you nap. You love to grab my shirt while you sleep and I love kissing your forehead. I kiss your forehead because it is giant. Sorry, you got that from your dad and I. You might grow into yours, I wasn't so lucky. One day someone might call it a "five head", but that's ok. No matter how big it is you will always be cooler than all the other kids for sure. Anyway, these moments when we are snuggled up together are good for my heart, knowing that you are happy and comfy in my arms.
This morning we went for a walk with Mamaw and you slept the whole time, then we had a dance party with the Yo Gabba Gabba gang (Brobee is your dad and I's favorite). After that I gave you a bath and you splashed around a lot today. You love baths and hate when they are over. We wrap you up in a towel and once you realize there is no more warm water you usually cry.
Later today we are eating lunch with the Sharp family. They have a daughter, Millie, who is a year and a half older than you. I'm sure you will be friends with Millie since we are so close with her parents. In fact, you will be surrounded by little girls for a while. You met baby Clementine a few weeks ago, and our friends Peter & Vikki and Alisa & Bryan are both having girls in October. But that's ok, you'll learn quick that girls make the world go round. You will have a lot of strong role models in your life, both male and female, and I'm very thankful for that.
Right now we are trying to get you to sleep on your back more, you are doing ok but aren't quite sleeping through the night yet. That's fine, because I know soon enough I will have to drag your butt out of bed in the mornings for school/practice/games.
I'm rambling. Once again we love you so much, even when you throw fits and even when it is 2am and you want to be awake. Your dad and I slept a whole lot before you came, so it's all good.
Love,
Mom
P.S. You drool a lot right now because you are teething. You drool worse then Ricky the dog. And if you have been drooling all day your cheeks smell funky. Yesterday your dad was holding you and kissed your cheeks, then pulled away because you had baby stink face. Of course you just smiled the whole time. You thankfully like having your face washed. And yes, you still fart a lot. Our house is a bucket of farts between us three and the dogs.
Saturday, July 21, 2012
What I think that maybe I might believe
I've found a few mom blogs that have made posts about what they believe. It's kind of like a declaration of the things that they believe about being a parent. How they think a child should be raised and what they believe about some of the hot button issues. After reading a few I was a little put off by the whole thing. Some of the bullet points I agreed with, others I did not. These moms seem so sure that their way is the right way.
I decided I wasn't going to write a "My Beliefs" post because I have only been a parent for 12 weeks. 12 weeks isn't enough time to get up on my soap box and talk about how a child should be raised. If there is one thing I've learned about being a parent it's that things are always changing. Therefore what I believe today may not be what I believe tomorrow. What I know I don't want is to look back on a post I've written and be embarrassed by sounding close minded or set in my ways. What I do want are friends and role models who are content to watch me raise my child, faults and all, and give advice only when I ask for it. Every time I turn around there is someone talking about attachment parenting or letting your baby cry it out and it seems like moms are ready to battle it out without knowing each special circumstance. I feel like moms should be supporting each other as long as the child is healthy and happy.
I used to think a lot of things. I used to think that I could let Will cry it out, but now I can't imagine letting him cry until he fell asleep. It's just not for me, not at this age at least. I also don't think that you can spoil a baby by rocking them or holding them too much. I rock Will to sleep (or Brent does) every night because we both enjoy it so much. I don't think that I want Will to sleep in our bed, but he is still in a bassinet in our room. I thought I would move him from our room to his nursery by the time he is three months old but that is only days away and I know I'm not ready to do that yet. I also wasn't sure if I could breastfeed for long due to lack of knowledge and confidence, but here I am, master of the boob.
Some people might think I should take a stand and not be so wishy washy, but how silly is it to take a stand when I have no idea what the future holds. What I think now may be completely different next week or next month. What I will say is that us parents have to stick together. We have no right to judge or make passive aggressive comments about what other parents are doing. Aren't we all just winging it anyway? We won't know if we are doing it right or wrong until our kids grow up to be turds. Then we will look back and think "well maybe that didn't work." Until then I'll just keep on trucking and hope that my sweet Baby Will will grow up to be a great kid and a respectable adult.
Damn. I wasn't going to get on my soap box, yet here I am. I'll get off now, just wanted to say that we are all going through the same milestones and events with our children. And while they are the same there are many different approaches to handle them.
Alright, can someone help me off this thing?
I decided I wasn't going to write a "My Beliefs" post because I have only been a parent for 12 weeks. 12 weeks isn't enough time to get up on my soap box and talk about how a child should be raised. If there is one thing I've learned about being a parent it's that things are always changing. Therefore what I believe today may not be what I believe tomorrow. What I know I don't want is to look back on a post I've written and be embarrassed by sounding close minded or set in my ways. What I do want are friends and role models who are content to watch me raise my child, faults and all, and give advice only when I ask for it. Every time I turn around there is someone talking about attachment parenting or letting your baby cry it out and it seems like moms are ready to battle it out without knowing each special circumstance. I feel like moms should be supporting each other as long as the child is healthy and happy.
I used to think a lot of things. I used to think that I could let Will cry it out, but now I can't imagine letting him cry until he fell asleep. It's just not for me, not at this age at least. I also don't think that you can spoil a baby by rocking them or holding them too much. I rock Will to sleep (or Brent does) every night because we both enjoy it so much. I don't think that I want Will to sleep in our bed, but he is still in a bassinet in our room. I thought I would move him from our room to his nursery by the time he is three months old but that is only days away and I know I'm not ready to do that yet. I also wasn't sure if I could breastfeed for long due to lack of knowledge and confidence, but here I am, master of the boob.
Some people might think I should take a stand and not be so wishy washy, but how silly is it to take a stand when I have no idea what the future holds. What I think now may be completely different next week or next month. What I will say is that us parents have to stick together. We have no right to judge or make passive aggressive comments about what other parents are doing. Aren't we all just winging it anyway? We won't know if we are doing it right or wrong until our kids grow up to be turds. Then we will look back and think "well maybe that didn't work." Until then I'll just keep on trucking and hope that my sweet Baby Will will grow up to be a great kid and a respectable adult.
Damn. I wasn't going to get on my soap box, yet here I am. I'll get off now, just wanted to say that we are all going through the same milestones and events with our children. And while they are the same there are many different approaches to handle them.
Alright, can someone help me off this thing?
Sunday, July 15, 2012
The Transition
The transition. Every parent knows it, that moment when you have to transfer your sleeping baby from your arms to their sleeper/crib/bed without waking them up. I've gotten quite good at doing this since I rock Will to sleep every night, but it wasn't easy at first.
When Will was younger he was a lot easier to get to sleep at night. Now that he is super interested in everything it has gotten slightly more challenging. I have found that if I rock him to sleep in the glider he will pass out pretty quickly, usually no more than 30 minutes of rocking and he's done. I sit and stare at him and wait for my signal. There is a difference between barely asleep and completely out. I know Will is out when he begins to open mouth breathe or his eyes quit fluttering. At that point my parent ninja skills kick in. I position my arms in a way that is supporting his whole body so that when the boppy pillow slides out from under him he won't be startled. Sometimes his giant man head has cut off the blood flow to my arm and it's asleep as well. If that happens I have to pump my hand a few times so I don't feel like I am going to drop him. Then I slowly begin to sit up. I get myself to the edge of the chair, then stand straight up without Will moving. As long as he is still motionless I begin my awkward shuffle walk to his sleeper. At this point I hope that the dogs don't follow me. I always think it is cute that they want to sit by the glider while I rock him, that is until Maki starts dancing around toe nails first. I stop and give her a stern look and mouth "no!". Surprisingly she knows that I am mad and stops walking. I always feel bad because she has no idea why I am telling her no, but she knows I mean business. As I slide my feet across the floor I can here Maki taking a few steps at a time behind me. Click....clack....clickity clack.....click...I shoot her another look and she freezes. Sometimes I am mid shuffle when I look down and Will is just staring at me. Noooooooooooo! I always freeze, hoping that he will shut his little eyes again and drift back to sleep. Sometimes he will. Other times he just stares and I know my transition has failed and it's back to the rocker.
The transition can be difficult, but it is very rewarding when it goes smoothly. You feel awesome when your baby is asleep and you can walk away from their bed and have a moment to yourself before you crash too.
When Will was younger he was a lot easier to get to sleep at night. Now that he is super interested in everything it has gotten slightly more challenging. I have found that if I rock him to sleep in the glider he will pass out pretty quickly, usually no more than 30 minutes of rocking and he's done. I sit and stare at him and wait for my signal. There is a difference between barely asleep and completely out. I know Will is out when he begins to open mouth breathe or his eyes quit fluttering. At that point my parent ninja skills kick in. I position my arms in a way that is supporting his whole body so that when the boppy pillow slides out from under him he won't be startled. Sometimes his giant man head has cut off the blood flow to my arm and it's asleep as well. If that happens I have to pump my hand a few times so I don't feel like I am going to drop him. Then I slowly begin to sit up. I get myself to the edge of the chair, then stand straight up without Will moving. As long as he is still motionless I begin my awkward shuffle walk to his sleeper. At this point I hope that the dogs don't follow me. I always think it is cute that they want to sit by the glider while I rock him, that is until Maki starts dancing around toe nails first. I stop and give her a stern look and mouth "no!". Surprisingly she knows that I am mad and stops walking. I always feel bad because she has no idea why I am telling her no, but she knows I mean business. As I slide my feet across the floor I can here Maki taking a few steps at a time behind me. Click....clack....clickity clack.....click...I shoot her another look and she freezes. Sometimes I am mid shuffle when I look down and Will is just staring at me. Noooooooooooo! I always freeze, hoping that he will shut his little eyes again and drift back to sleep. Sometimes he will. Other times he just stares and I know my transition has failed and it's back to the rocker.
The transition can be difficult, but it is very rewarding when it goes smoothly. You feel awesome when your baby is asleep and you can walk away from their bed and have a moment to yourself before you crash too.
Friday, July 13, 2012
Review: Graco SnugRider Stroller
I never realized there were so many stroller options. When we registered for our shower we got a Graco Travel System which comes with a tank of a stroller and car seat. While I love the big stroller for our long walks I hated lugging it around and going into stores with it. The stroller alone weighs a whopping 27 lbs, so getting it in and out of the trunk is a task. I remember going somewhere with my mom when Will was only a few weeks old. I couldn't lift anything because of my csection so my mom had the task of loading the stroller into the trunk. While she was doing so I was sitting in the car with Will and I began to feel the whole car shake. I looked back and there was my mom trying to shove the stroller into the trunk to no avail. I couldn't help but laugh. It was the same story trying to get the stroller out of the trunk, my poor mom tugging and pulling. I began to search the internet for small foldable strollers that also fit newborns. The only ones that I could find were very expensive and I couldn't bring myself to pay over 200 dollars for another stroller. Eventually I gave up.
The other night Brent came home with exciting news. He was working at Whole Foods when he saw a couple with the SnugRider stroller. He asked them what it was and they explained that it is a stroller frame that you snap your car seat into and it has a large basket underneath to store things or stash groceries. The best part, it only weighs 12lbs. I immediately did the research online and knew that we had to have one.
The other night Brent came home with exciting news. He was working at Whole Foods when he saw a couple with the SnugRider stroller. He asked them what it was and they explained that it is a stroller frame that you snap your car seat into and it has a large basket underneath to store things or stash groceries. The best part, it only weighs 12lbs. I immediately did the research online and knew that we had to have one.
We ordered ours for $60.00 online. I'm not sure if they carry them in store at babies r us, but we have free shipping through Amazon Prime so that was more cost efficient for us. It took less than 5 minutes to put together out of the box, just snapped the wheels on and it was ready to go. Very easy to fold up and put in the trunk, it weighs less than Will for crying out loud.
This is it with the car seat hooked in. I took it on our trip to Whole Foods today. The basket underneath was great for grocery shopping and I was able to fit 3 bags worth of groceries in it. Obviously you could also just put your car seat on the shopping cart, but there are some places you will need to go that won't have a shopping cart. Plus carrying the car seat through the parking lot is such a pain in the butt for me since my baby weighs a ton.
After our shopping trip I was able to put Will in the car, then fold up the stroller and put it into the trunk with one hand.
Will enjoying his new set of wheels
The only con is once Will outgrows this car seat we will be unable to use the stroller. I wish I would have known about this product to begin with. However, once Will can sit up and hold his head up we can upgrade to a small foldable stroller.
Thursday, July 12, 2012
A Note to Our Son
William,
Today you are 72 days old.
You arrived on a Tuesday on the first day of May. Since then our lives have been a whirlwind of emotions and diapers. I wanted to take a moment and tell you some things that are happening right now, because one day I won't be able to remember the little things. There will be many more notes that follow.
I love rocking you to sleep. I sit in the glider in your nursery and we snuggle up together. Sometimes you stare into my eyes sleepily and smile. Other times you are overtired and you cry as you fight sleep. Either way I hold you close and rock you until you drift off. Your dad and I call it going to sleepy town. We will talk to you and say "don't miss the train to sleepy town!" or, if you are fighting sleep we say "don't miss your stop at sleepy town, it's a wonderful place to go!" Your dad is quite fond of telling you that you are taking a rocket to sleepy town, because your dad is a space nerd. No matter what mode of transportation, you eventually get there. It's a time of peace and quite around the house. It gives your dad and I time to hang out together while you rest and grow.
When it's time to wake you up and feed you one last time before we sleep your dad rushes over to be the one to do so. He slowly unwraps your blanket, smiling the whole time. You stretch and sleepily open your eyes and your dad's smile grows larger as both of your eyes light up. It's wonderful to watch. When you wake up and see us you smile so big, you're never upset. You start squirming and smiling and my heart about explodes with love.
I love when you make your little noises. You look at us and get all worked up as if you want to talk so badly, then you squeal or say "Ngyu". That's your favorite and ours too. If we repeat the sound back to you you stare in amazement and begin to work on your next sound while you squirm and kick. I can't wait for you to start talking, but I'm sure when that moment comes I will still miss your little noises. Your dad and I talk to you all of the time. Your dad talks about the universe and other science news. I talk to you about things you can be when you grow up and what happened while I was at work or what I am doing at that time. You listen bright eyed, you're always happy when we are talking to you.
Yesterday you grabbed and held onto a toy for the first time. I freaked out about it and yelled at your dad to come see. And last night you slept in your room for 4 hours all by yourself. Your dad and I told you how proud we were of you when we got you up. What a big boy.
We take you for long walks in your stroller on the days that I am off of work. We go around the Seneca loop and you always take a nap while we walk. You seem to enjoy it even though when it is hot out you are a big ball of sweaty baby.
Time has already gone by so fast. On one hand I am eager for you to grow and learn, and on the other I want to hold on to these moments when you let me hold you and kiss you. Everyday you are changing and everyday we are changing too. I'm writing this too you so that I can remember the feelings I had in these fleeting moments and so that you can see how excited and amazed we were as new parents. When you are old enough to read this you will have already learned that life isn't always easy, but I hope you will also have learned that your dad and I are here to support you and love you unconditionally.
Love,
Mom
P.S. You fart a lot. Farts are funny and even though I am an adult and your mother I still laugh at farts. Sometimes I have to leave the room to laugh when you fart in your sleep because I am afraid I will wake you up.
Today you are 72 days old.
You arrived on a Tuesday on the first day of May. Since then our lives have been a whirlwind of emotions and diapers. I wanted to take a moment and tell you some things that are happening right now, because one day I won't be able to remember the little things. There will be many more notes that follow.
I love rocking you to sleep. I sit in the glider in your nursery and we snuggle up together. Sometimes you stare into my eyes sleepily and smile. Other times you are overtired and you cry as you fight sleep. Either way I hold you close and rock you until you drift off. Your dad and I call it going to sleepy town. We will talk to you and say "don't miss the train to sleepy town!" or, if you are fighting sleep we say "don't miss your stop at sleepy town, it's a wonderful place to go!" Your dad is quite fond of telling you that you are taking a rocket to sleepy town, because your dad is a space nerd. No matter what mode of transportation, you eventually get there. It's a time of peace and quite around the house. It gives your dad and I time to hang out together while you rest and grow.
When it's time to wake you up and feed you one last time before we sleep your dad rushes over to be the one to do so. He slowly unwraps your blanket, smiling the whole time. You stretch and sleepily open your eyes and your dad's smile grows larger as both of your eyes light up. It's wonderful to watch. When you wake up and see us you smile so big, you're never upset. You start squirming and smiling and my heart about explodes with love.
I love when you make your little noises. You look at us and get all worked up as if you want to talk so badly, then you squeal or say "Ngyu". That's your favorite and ours too. If we repeat the sound back to you you stare in amazement and begin to work on your next sound while you squirm and kick. I can't wait for you to start talking, but I'm sure when that moment comes I will still miss your little noises. Your dad and I talk to you all of the time. Your dad talks about the universe and other science news. I talk to you about things you can be when you grow up and what happened while I was at work or what I am doing at that time. You listen bright eyed, you're always happy when we are talking to you.
Yesterday you grabbed and held onto a toy for the first time. I freaked out about it and yelled at your dad to come see. And last night you slept in your room for 4 hours all by yourself. Your dad and I told you how proud we were of you when we got you up. What a big boy.
We take you for long walks in your stroller on the days that I am off of work. We go around the Seneca loop and you always take a nap while we walk. You seem to enjoy it even though when it is hot out you are a big ball of sweaty baby.
Time has already gone by so fast. On one hand I am eager for you to grow and learn, and on the other I want to hold on to these moments when you let me hold you and kiss you. Everyday you are changing and everyday we are changing too. I'm writing this too you so that I can remember the feelings I had in these fleeting moments and so that you can see how excited and amazed we were as new parents. When you are old enough to read this you will have already learned that life isn't always easy, but I hope you will also have learned that your dad and I are here to support you and love you unconditionally.
Love,
Mom
P.S. You fart a lot. Farts are funny and even though I am an adult and your mother I still laugh at farts. Sometimes I have to leave the room to laugh when you fart in your sleep because I am afraid I will wake you up.
Just a big head
This is my follow up to my post "2 Month Check Up". We went this past Tuesday to have an ultrasound done on Will's head. Here's a picture of him in the waiting room. When he gets sleepy his little jaws droop and he looks like a bulldog to me. He looks pretty pitiful, especially with his little ankle bracelet on.
He did great for the ultrasound. After waiting for a while and nursing him before we went back he fell asleep when the technician put the warm goo on his head. They were able to get good shots since he was out for the whole thing. It went way better than I was expecting. We didn't get the results that same day. but instead had to wait a few days for a call after the results were sent to a radiologist to review.
The doctor called while I was at work and left me a voicemail. When I saw that it was the doctor's number I could feel my heart beat a little quicker in anticipation of what the message might say. I listened and heard the best words ever, "the ultrasound results were normal." A huge weight was lifted from my shoulders and I couldn't help but smile. My baby just has a big head! As long as he is healthy I don't mind having to stretch out the neck holes on all of his onesies.
He did great for the ultrasound. After waiting for a while and nursing him before we went back he fell asleep when the technician put the warm goo on his head. They were able to get good shots since he was out for the whole thing. It went way better than I was expecting. We didn't get the results that same day. but instead had to wait a few days for a call after the results were sent to a radiologist to review.
The doctor called while I was at work and left me a voicemail. When I saw that it was the doctor's number I could feel my heart beat a little quicker in anticipation of what the message might say. I listened and heard the best words ever, "the ultrasound results were normal." A huge weight was lifted from my shoulders and I couldn't help but smile. My baby just has a big head! As long as he is healthy I don't mind having to stretch out the neck holes on all of his onesies.
Monday, July 9, 2012
Sleep
All that I heard while pregnant was "get sleep now because once that baby comes YOU WILL NEVER SLEEP AGAIN." followed by an evil smile. I hated when people told me that. Mostly because I love sleep very much, and also because that's not what I wanted to hear. So I thought I would break it down for the soon to be new moms out there. And of course please remember that my experience is just one of many. You could have a baby that never sleeps, or one that sleeps all of the time.
If you are going to breastfeed you need to understand how often breastfed babies eat. Although I read a ton of information about breastfeeding prior to Will arriving I must have missed that chapter. In the beginning it is every 1 1/2 to 2 hours. Now take a minute and think about how much sleep that affords you.
Did you do the math? Are you sad? Yeah, I was too. I wish I could be positive here, but that first month sucked for me. So just be prepared.
After that things get better. I promise it gets better! Will started sleeping for long periods (4-5 hour stretches over night) around 4 weeks, so hang in there. When your baby does that for the first time you wake up and feel like a new person. It's amazing.
Slowly your baby gets into a routine and you have this new mom power where you know you should be tired but you don't care anymore because you have shit to do. All of the time there is shit to do.
So I won't sit here and say annoying things like "you don't understand how tired you will be" or "get your sleep now!" because no, you don't understand and even if you sleep everyday all day until the baby is born you will still be tired once they are here. I will say this though, having a baby is amazing. Seriously. Yes they cry and you will get up at 2am and be like "dammit baby!!!" while you angrily get out of bed. At 2am this morning Will decided he was hungry and I found myself huffing and puffing to the nursery saying things like, "oh really? wake up at 2 am when I have to work in 5 hours? is that funny to you?". I'm not proud of it. Then you will see them and take it down a notch because they are a baby. And this is what babies do. If I was laying in bed and woke up hungry but had no means to feed myself I would cry too. In fact if I am hungry now I get pretty upset until I am fed.
One day your kid will be grown and you will get to sleep in and a part of you is going to miss getting up during the middle of the night and having that moment when it is just you and your baby. It's as if you are the only ones for miles around and it is beautiful. The exhaustion will pass and it is those moments that you will remember.
If you are going to breastfeed you need to understand how often breastfed babies eat. Although I read a ton of information about breastfeeding prior to Will arriving I must have missed that chapter. In the beginning it is every 1 1/2 to 2 hours. Now take a minute and think about how much sleep that affords you.
Did you do the math? Are you sad? Yeah, I was too. I wish I could be positive here, but that first month sucked for me. So just be prepared.
After that things get better. I promise it gets better! Will started sleeping for long periods (4-5 hour stretches over night) around 4 weeks, so hang in there. When your baby does that for the first time you wake up and feel like a new person. It's amazing.
Slowly your baby gets into a routine and you have this new mom power where you know you should be tired but you don't care anymore because you have shit to do. All of the time there is shit to do.
So I won't sit here and say annoying things like "you don't understand how tired you will be" or "get your sleep now!" because no, you don't understand and even if you sleep everyday all day until the baby is born you will still be tired once they are here. I will say this though, having a baby is amazing. Seriously. Yes they cry and you will get up at 2am and be like "dammit baby!!!" while you angrily get out of bed. At 2am this morning Will decided he was hungry and I found myself huffing and puffing to the nursery saying things like, "oh really? wake up at 2 am when I have to work in 5 hours? is that funny to you?". I'm not proud of it. Then you will see them and take it down a notch because they are a baby. And this is what babies do. If I was laying in bed and woke up hungry but had no means to feed myself I would cry too. In fact if I am hungry now I get pretty upset until I am fed.
One day your kid will be grown and you will get to sleep in and a part of you is going to miss getting up during the middle of the night and having that moment when it is just you and your baby. It's as if you are the only ones for miles around and it is beautiful. The exhaustion will pass and it is those moments that you will remember.
Friday, July 6, 2012
2 month check up
In my last post about Will's 1 month doctor check up I discussed how taking your kid to the doctor makes you feel like a parent. It makes you feel like you are responsible and an adult. It seems like not that long ago that my mom was taking me to my doctor appointments, and now the tables have turned. So what does it feel like in that moment when they tell you something may be wrong with your baby?
Will's second month check up started out great. The nurse came in and measured him. We weighed him, a whopping 14 lbs. Then they measured his head, entered the numbers, and left the room. When the doctor came in we talked about the basics. I had no complaints or concerns, Will has been doing great. I asked about his head size since at his last visit we were concerned about him being in the 100th percentile. She showed me his growth on a chart and explained that he was still 100th percentile but he is following the curve and his growth is consistent. I felt a weight lift from my shoulders. After we discussed his growth she began doing her exam. Will was smiling and being really great for everything. I was proud of him for being so brave while this stranger moved him around to check ears, eyes, mouth, and reflexes. She then lifted him up, flipped him over, and studied his head shape. I was waiting for her to say something along the lines of "your baby wins the most awesome baby prize!", which might not be a thing but it should be. Instead she furrowed her brow and said, "you know what mom, I'm concerned about his head shape, it's triangular". I felt my heart sink. She scooped him up and told me she wanted to consult with the other doctors and just like that she was out of the room with him. I stood, alone and unsure, letting her few words sink in. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes. It hit me out of nowhere, I wasn't prepared for anything to be wrong with Will. And just as quickly as it came, it left. I took a deep breath and decided what kind of mother I wanted to be. I wanted to be logical and strong. I was getting upset about something that may or may not be a problem. Will was growing and developing normally and was a happy and curious baby. There was no need to break down over just a concern. The doctor came back into the room with Will, who was smiling with his big fat cheeks. I held him while she explained that the other doctors agree and they would like to image his head. Time to use my medical knowledge to ask the right questions. What exactly are we worried about? What imaging will be done? When will the tests be run? What do I need to watch for until our appointment? Turns out some babies with his head shape have brains that are growing too quickly. As the brain grows it pushes the skull out, and when the suture lines (the lines between the bony plates) begin to seal it can can cause increased pressure in the skull. The doctor went on to tell me that in her gut she feels that he just genetically has a large head, but she would much rather be safe than sorry. I agree, it is probably nothing, but lets check it out.
After our talk the nurse came in and gave Will his vaccines. He got 2 shots and one oral for the rotavirus. He did great for one shot, then cried his eyes out for the other. Once again he was easily consoled and was asleep by the time we were out to the car.
I struggled with whether I would write about this new turn of events. For some reason it seemed too personal. If I put it out there and something is wrong with Will do I keep blogging about it? Will it look like I want a pity party? Then I remembered the whole reason I began this blog. Not to get attention, but instead to help other parents or soon to be parents. Having a newborn can be a lonely time, which is odd considering it is such a common occurrence. Writing this blog has helped me connect with other moms and I am hopeful that it has been informative to many. So why would I not write about something that shook me to my core? Hearing that something could be wrong with my child was difficult, even when I am sure that Will is a healthy baby.
We go for an ultrasound next week. I really feel like everything will be great and we will laugh about this when he is older. I plan on using it to scare his pregnant wife. Telling her "His head was so big that they thought something was wrong with him!", or if he has a boyfriend then we can just give him a hard time about it. Yep, everything is going to be fine.
Will's second month check up started out great. The nurse came in and measured him. We weighed him, a whopping 14 lbs. Then they measured his head, entered the numbers, and left the room. When the doctor came in we talked about the basics. I had no complaints or concerns, Will has been doing great. I asked about his head size since at his last visit we were concerned about him being in the 100th percentile. She showed me his growth on a chart and explained that he was still 100th percentile but he is following the curve and his growth is consistent. I felt a weight lift from my shoulders. After we discussed his growth she began doing her exam. Will was smiling and being really great for everything. I was proud of him for being so brave while this stranger moved him around to check ears, eyes, mouth, and reflexes. She then lifted him up, flipped him over, and studied his head shape. I was waiting for her to say something along the lines of "your baby wins the most awesome baby prize!", which might not be a thing but it should be. Instead she furrowed her brow and said, "you know what mom, I'm concerned about his head shape, it's triangular". I felt my heart sink. She scooped him up and told me she wanted to consult with the other doctors and just like that she was out of the room with him. I stood, alone and unsure, letting her few words sink in. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes. It hit me out of nowhere, I wasn't prepared for anything to be wrong with Will. And just as quickly as it came, it left. I took a deep breath and decided what kind of mother I wanted to be. I wanted to be logical and strong. I was getting upset about something that may or may not be a problem. Will was growing and developing normally and was a happy and curious baby. There was no need to break down over just a concern. The doctor came back into the room with Will, who was smiling with his big fat cheeks. I held him while she explained that the other doctors agree and they would like to image his head. Time to use my medical knowledge to ask the right questions. What exactly are we worried about? What imaging will be done? When will the tests be run? What do I need to watch for until our appointment? Turns out some babies with his head shape have brains that are growing too quickly. As the brain grows it pushes the skull out, and when the suture lines (the lines between the bony plates) begin to seal it can can cause increased pressure in the skull. The doctor went on to tell me that in her gut she feels that he just genetically has a large head, but she would much rather be safe than sorry. I agree, it is probably nothing, but lets check it out.
After our talk the nurse came in and gave Will his vaccines. He got 2 shots and one oral for the rotavirus. He did great for one shot, then cried his eyes out for the other. Once again he was easily consoled and was asleep by the time we were out to the car.
I struggled with whether I would write about this new turn of events. For some reason it seemed too personal. If I put it out there and something is wrong with Will do I keep blogging about it? Will it look like I want a pity party? Then I remembered the whole reason I began this blog. Not to get attention, but instead to help other parents or soon to be parents. Having a newborn can be a lonely time, which is odd considering it is such a common occurrence. Writing this blog has helped me connect with other moms and I am hopeful that it has been informative to many. So why would I not write about something that shook me to my core? Hearing that something could be wrong with my child was difficult, even when I am sure that Will is a healthy baby.
We go for an ultrasound next week. I really feel like everything will be great and we will laugh about this when he is older. I plan on using it to scare his pregnant wife. Telling her "His head was so big that they thought something was wrong with him!", or if he has a boyfriend then we can just give him a hard time about it. Yep, everything is going to be fine.
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
What We Eat: Kale Pad Thai
Made this for lunch today! It took me 20 minutes from start to finish and is super yummy.
What you'll need:
1 cup roasted and unsalted peanuts
1 cup nutritional yeast
2 cloves of garlic
Juice from 1/2 a lemon
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 cup vegetable broth
1 tbsp low sodium tamari (soy sauce)
3/4 cup water
Soba noodles
1 bunch of kale leaves
Handful if cherry tomatoes, halved
In a blender (I used a magic bullet) put the peanuts, nutritional yeast, garlic, lemon juice, salt, broth, tamari, and water. Blend, add extra water if the sauce is too thick. Set aside.
Steam your kale leaves. I just ripped the kale leaves up with my hands into small pieces.
While that is steaming cut up your tomatoes and set them aside. Once your kale is done combine that with your sauce and tomatoes in a pan. Turn on low heat and toss.
Boil your noodles. Soba noodles cook very quickly. Make as many noodles as you like, Brent likes meals with less noodles, and I like it to be noodle heavy so I compromised, but either way is fine. Once the noodles are done put them in the pan with your kale mixture and toss to coat.
Ta Da! Super healthy noms.
The recipe also calls for seaweed flakes as a garnish. I LOVE seaweed flakes because they are yummy and very good for you. I usually buy them in sheets and just tear them apart, but I found these at the grocery last week:
What you'll need:
1 cup roasted and unsalted peanuts
1 cup nutritional yeast
2 cloves of garlic
Juice from 1/2 a lemon
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 cup vegetable broth
1 tbsp low sodium tamari (soy sauce)
3/4 cup water
Soba noodles
1 bunch of kale leaves
Handful if cherry tomatoes, halved
In a blender (I used a magic bullet) put the peanuts, nutritional yeast, garlic, lemon juice, salt, broth, tamari, and water. Blend, add extra water if the sauce is too thick. Set aside.
Steam your kale leaves. I just ripped the kale leaves up with my hands into small pieces.
Boil your noodles. Soba noodles cook very quickly. Make as many noodles as you like, Brent likes meals with less noodles, and I like it to be noodle heavy so I compromised, but either way is fine. Once the noodles are done put them in the pan with your kale mixture and toss to coat.
Ta Da! Super healthy noms.
The recipe also calls for seaweed flakes as a garnish. I LOVE seaweed flakes because they are yummy and very good for you. I usually buy them in sheets and just tear them apart, but I found these at the grocery last week:
They are perfect for sprinkling on dishes like this or in soups....or on sandwichs or salads. Here is the finished product :)
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